Reaching for you
by Argenteus Acies
Summary: It's all suddenly fallen into place for Mimi, she knows she loves him and he loves her...The only problem is she can't seem to find Matt...no one can. Will it all end happily ever after?
1. A Change of Heart

Disclaimer: I don't own digimon, I'm not that smart to come up with the concept. I own all characters that aren't in the Digimon series. 

Chapter 1 

"-And then she had the nerve to tell me that it was my fault that we had to redo that scene again. I mean she is such a liar." The blond bimbo complained as I stared into my wineglass vaguely wishing it to be something stronger… like acid. 

I drew my gaze back up to my date, Samantha or something like that who continued to prattle on about something that I really didn't care about and sighed emptying my glass. _I have to stop doing this to myself; I don't have to live up to the playboy standards the media's given me. _I shifted in my seat. _I see a pretty dancer lacking the brains to have a sensible conversation ask her out for dinner when she knows any relationship will be over the next morning only one thing will come out of that night and they **accept** it, it's their **pleasure**! None of them have ever complained all saying that they'll always be around and tell their friends that they got a piece of Matt Ishida. This used to excite me, why do I feel so disgusted now? _I closed my eyes.

Samantha apparently finally noticed my lack of attention. 

"So how do you think the new video clip will rate?" She asked, casually placing her hand on the table where I could reach it. 

Yep this is when I say something complementary about how good she looks and then wham bam thank you ma'am next morning say that I had fun and leave. I almost sighed gently taking her hand. "Well with you in it I'm sure it will skyrocket." She blushed a faint rose and smiled. I barely managed to call up my trademark smile for some reason makes girls go wild. "Do you want to get out of here?" 

Her green eyes sparkled. "Yes." 

I stood slowly helping her into her coat paying for the meal. Wrapping my arm around her shoulders, escorted her to my porsche, flashed her another fake smile and stepped on the gas tearing down the road. 

Why don't I feel interested anymore? _Too late now I don't have any way to back out. _I just pulled up at the hotel when my phone rang. I gave Samantha an apologetic look and brought it up to my ear. 

"Matt here." 

"Yamato Ishida don't tell me that you're to good to call in at a regular basis! You're making us worry about how big your head is getting without us there to shrink it." I called up a frown.

"Aw damn man do I have to Pete? I thought it would be at least a week till you called me again." I sighed giving Samantha a look of regret somehow managing not to burst into a song and dance right there in my car. _God I should have been an actor. _

"Pete? Hello? Matt this is Tai." He said confused. 

"Yeah I know, Hang on give me a minute." I put it down leaving my friend thoroughly confused and started the engine again. 

"Pete, my manager has some sort of problem I have to go through tonight. Can you catch a cab? I'm really sorry." I pulled a couple of notes out of my wallet. She took the money and I sped away. _Not very gentlemanly but I'm free. _I picked up my phone 

"Tai thank you so much I owe you a holiday or something." I laughed 

"Matt where the hell have you been, don't tell me Playboying again?" 

I laughed again, letting the breeze play with my hair.

"You got me out of doing something I didn't want to do, from this day forward the Playboy is dead. So how's your world doing?" I pulled up at a cheap looking motel. 

"Life's the same, coach is a jackass, Sora twisted her ankle at tennis practice and is sitting around moping she'd want that holiday you offered so don't you dare back out. Oh and my dear sweet Chikara is tugging at my sleeve and has been bugging us to ring you for the last week so you'd better talk to her." He growled.

I smiled at the image. "Sure put her on please." 

"Unca Matt?" Chikara chirped happily.

"Hey Kara, how are you?" I grinned to myself getting out of the car.

"I'm good, Mommy hurt her ankle so Daddy took me shopping and I got a ice-cream because I was so well be-hav-ed." She said the last word proudly.

"What flavour?" I asked interested pulling up the roof and locking the door.

"Chocolate." 

"Yeah that's the best." I confirmed walking inside taping on the counter to get the receptionist attention. 

"Unca Matt, when are you gonna visit again?" 

"Well I'm in England and my next job is in America my plane leaving tomorrow and I'm making it go the long way so I can stop in Japan on Sunday I'll be there for two days. I'll take you out to wherever you want to." I pulled out some money waving it in front of the receptionist. She nodded checking her list.

"You promise?"

"Would I ever lie to you?" I asked, getting the key for my new room.

"Well… Daddy says sometimes people lie so others won't get hurt." 

"Chikara I promise that I will never ever lie to you, ok baby? Can I talk to Daddy now?" I asked plodding up the stairs.

"Ok see you soon bye bye."

"Bye." To say the room was decent would be a sin but I flopped on the bed happily. 

"What did you promise Kara?" Tai asked immediately. 

"Promised that I'd never lie to her, I'll be up on Sunday." I yawned.

"Yeah sure, man get some sleep I'll talk to you Sunday. Bye."

"See ya" I mumbled dropping my phone and curling up for sleep. 

*~*~*~*~*

I awoke to an annoyingly bright beam of sunlight shining through my eyelids. I clumsily rolled off the bed and pushed my hair out of my eyes. I sighed looking at my watch I had maybe two hours before I had to get on my plane. I stomped down the stairs and handed the keys back and got into my car speeding back to where I was supposed to have slept last night, to gather my things. I bolted up to my room to avoid any unwanted conversations and slammed the door. I looked at my reflection. Long jagged blond hair the longest spikes barely brushing my shoulders. _Too recognizable. _"Think Ishida, don't want to be swamped as soon as I get off the plane." I muttered using gel to slick it back covering it with a black beanie. I pulled on a pair of baggy blue jeans a dark blue shirt a denim jacket. I smiled at my transformation and grabbed my travel bag looking around my room for lose items. 

"Matt! You awake man?" I swung the door open. Steve grinned running his hand through his short black hair, green eyes laughing. "I'm guessing this is one of the dear-god-don't-scream-wildly-at-me-and-try-to-molest-me trips." 

I nodded laughing moving to let him in. 

"So, Pete told me were having a holiday, two days in Japan. Visiting a girl?" 

I smirked at my drummer. "Of course I am. I talked to her on the phone last night" I gathered up my songbooks while Steve opened the fridge promptly filling his pockets with the mini milks. 

"Lucky dog, girls all over the world want you. So this girl what's she like?" He closed the fridge and turned to smile at me. 

I raised my eyebrow. "She's my goddaughter. Those are my milks by the way." 

Steve laughed. "You get the women I get the milk, it's on our contract." 

I shook my head turning around to continue my search. 

"Anyway, why do we always have to stop in Japan all the time we only stop in Canada when we have concerts and we have three Canadian's in Timber Wolves. We stop at Japan even if there's an quicker route you're the only one who can speak Japanese in the band." 

I threw my bag at his stomach. "That's because I'm Pete's favorite and I make this band worth millions. Now I'm guessing that you want a lift?" Steve nodded throwing my bag back to me; I slung it over my shoulder and gently picked up my guitar. 

"Any new songs being made in that mind of yours?" He asked grabbing his bags. 

I opened the boot to my car shoving my bags in, reverently placing my guitar on top.

"We just released a song I'm not magical." I muttered fiddling with the car radio. 

"Believe me Matt Ishida before the end of the month you'll at least have the melody worked out." I shrugged popping on my shades. 

"Whatever." 

*~*~*~*~*

"Mimi, can you come in here for a minute." Sharon called. 

I looked up from my sketchbook and rubbed my eyes. _It's really late; I'm so tired. _"Yeah, hang on." I muttered, slipping my books into my bag. I walked into Sharon's studio. "Hey, what's up?" I yawned. 

My redheaded partner smiled. "Meems have you decided whether to be interviewed by Today's Fashion they really want to get to know the, what was it?" She flicked through her notepad. "They said 'The mastermind herself'"

I laughed. "I doubt it, we've got to be in L.A for the fashion show coming up and after that I'm going on a holiday." 

"Let me guess, you're going to Japan." She grinned.

I nodded. "Of course. I promised my friends I'd visit them." 

"I'm glad some people are so dedicated to their friends. I haven't seen my school friends for years." She picked up a sketch. "You ready to leave?" 

I nodded again. 

She smirked. "Good, because we have to go see the actual clothes now." 

I groaned. 

*~*~*~*~*

I reached out and knocked on the door and took a step back. "I'll get it!" Was yelled from the other side and the door sung open. "UNCA MATT!" Chikara screamed diving into my arms. 

"Hey Kara you've grown taller." I laughed ruffling her auburn hair. 

"I'm jealous, the famous Matt Ishida is hugging my daughter." Sora said smiling at us through the doorway. I grinned putting Kara back on the ground and hugged Sora. 

"Jealous women come with my job description." I laughed. She shook her head then stood on her tiptoes and kissed me on the cheek. 

"Missed you." She laughed gesturing for us to enter the house. 

Chikara tugged on my hand pulling me along then stopped. "Can I stay at your place tonight?" she asked looking up at me with brown puppy dog eyes. 

"Kara, Matt's just had a big trip he may be tired." Sora exasperated closing the front door. I lifted Kara up and balanced her on my hip. 

"It's no problem with me." I said quickly, walking into the well-furnished living room. "We could all go to my house for dinner, I can astound you with my cooking abilities." 

Sora leaned on the kitchen bench. "Well…" 

I winked at Kara and she giggled. We both turned to Sora with our bottom lips out.

"Pleeease!" 

"Okay!" She laughed. "When Tai gets home, happy? Kara you should go pack."

"Thank you Mummy." Chikara chirped before running down the hall. 

"You know you spoil her to much Matt, I live in fear that one day she'll convince you to adopt her and forget all about me." Sora joked.

"No that'll never happen," I laughed, "I'd have invited you as well and that would start a big giant media thing. 'Rock star takes Tennis Champion and daughter…' Someone might get the wrong idea." 

Sora rolled her eyes. "Thanks for the reassurance, I'll go help Kara. Help yourself to the fridge." She called already walking down the hall.

I walked around the counter and opened the fridge bending down. I heard the front door open then close and footsteps come into the kitchen. 

"Hey darlin' what's for dinner." Tai said. I tried not to laugh slowly standing with a soda in one hand. 

"Aw, Taichi, I didn't know you felt that way." I drawled, closing the fridge. 

Tai stood there looking shocked. "Matt?" 

I snickered. "What happened to darlin' did I do something wrong, snookums?" 

Tai shook his head laughing. "Always a pleasure Matt." 

Sora walked into the room with Chikara in tow. "She's all packed." She saw Tai and ran over to kiss him. "Hey darlin'." She said.

Tai and I burst out laughing. 

*~*~*~*~*

"That was great Matt, as always, I'm just glad you didn't add any chili." Tai said leaning back in his chair after eating his third helping. I laughed and slowly stood up to take their plates. 

"Tai help Matt." Sora said gently pushing on his shoulder. She turned to me. "I'll take Chikara to her room ok?" I looked over at the sleeping figure and smiled. She'd fallen asleep at the table probably waiting for her father to stop eating. 

"Yeah that's cool with me," I whispered, "Tai I'll wash up if you dry." Tai sighed, reluctantly heaving himself off the chair and following me into my kitchen.

I started the water running. "So how's everyone been?" I asked as he grabbed a towel. 

"Lemme see… well Davis is on my soccer team he's fine. Ken's still a bigshot lawyer. Uh. Joe is a doctor and is doing great. Izzy has his computer company keeping him busy." He shrugged. "You'll be seeing TK so I won't have to tell you what he's up to-" 

I shook my head. "I couldn't pull off enough days to go see him, just you guys."

Tai grinned "You won't believe this. TK got offered a place in some Big American basketball team. He's ecstatic."

"What? He hasn't finished his college degree yet! I thought he wanted to have a degree in journalism before he showed the would his skills." I said almost dropping a plate on the floor in surprise.

Tai laughed "Yeah that's right, he was ecstatic because this proves he will have a place when he's ready to show his skills." 

I shook my head laughing. "Just like TK, doing the thing no one suspects. He's still with Kari?"

"Yeah couldn't separate those two, the only reason TK's doing journalism is because Kari's doing it." Tai frowned. "That leaves Cody he's got his own dojo, Yolie you see her more than me and Mimi…I haven't heard from her in a while." 

"She's coming to visit us in a couple of days, didn't I tell you Tai?" Sora said sitting on the bench. 

I frowned. "She still acting?"

Sora burst out laughing. "Matt because you're famous you should have a better grasp on the world of the stars."

"I never pay attention, high altitudes make me dizzy." I mumbled.

Tai snickered as Sora rolled her eyes. "She's taking a break from acting and is spending more time as a fashion designer." 

I laughed. "What is it. Pink ala Mimi?" Tai started to laugh then caught his wife's glare and coughed.

"Like you can talk Prince of Darkness. I remember you wearing nothing but black for so long everyone thought you were a Goth." Sora said frowning at us.

"Yeah well…" I sighed. "Come on there has to be other things we can talk about."

Sora arched her eyebrow and crossed her arms.

Tai laughed. "So Matt where's your next concert?"

I mentally thanked Tai for getting me out of Sora's wraith. "It's in LA" 

"Heh, that's cool, what's with you're new video clip? I like the song but that clip doesn't suit your new anti-playboy status." Tai said grinning. 

I flinched as Sora started to smile. I knew some major teasing was coming on. 

"Yeah," She drawled, "I noticed that to, I mean it's not that noticeable with scantly clad dancers pretty much hanging off the band. Then there was the whole shirtless thing and all the fires flickering in the background and of course the perspiration. I mean if I didn't know better I'd say you were encouraging the media." 

Tai and Sora shared smiles both happy to be doing their favorite thing… teasing me. 

"Ok!" I muttered. "Not helping the playboy rumors, I promise next video won't have girls hanging off me." I paused thinking for a moment. "In fact if you really want the clip to be less sexy, I'll put Tai's 21st party video in it, drunken Tai hitting on a little old lady."

Tai went an unhealthy shade of pink as Sora failed her attempts not to laugh. 

*~*~*~*~*

Hey that's the end of Chapter 1, it's just the beginning next chapter Matt meets Mimi it will definitely be a Mimato. This is just the 'this is Yamato Ishida' chapter. 


	2. In the City of Angels

Disclaimer: I don't own Matt (Damn) or any other Digimon characters. I also don't own the song Low, Foo Fighters do.

Chapter 2 

Matt Lead Vocalist and Lead Guitarist

Dio Vocalist and Guitarist

Steve drummer

Mike Bass guitarist

( ) when Dio sings 

__

Italics are when Matt thinks

I jingled my keys nervously. Shifting in my seat. I could hear the chanting from here. 

I watched as Mike, Steve and Dio jumped around the room tackling each other and causing havoc to cover their nerves. I'd already locked Steve in the broom cupboard out of pure psychotic energy, trashed some chairs and taken part in a major water fight but unlike my band mates I still felt nervous. It was always the same and always ended after the first song. 

"Hey Matt," Dio said freeing himself from the other two, "Can I borrow your car while we're in America? You can have my bike. I promise I won't touch your guitar." 

I grinned. "Sure, all of the tour in America or just some of it?" Part of being such close friends in this band includes sharing everything. The only exception is my guitar, which is treated like the bands God…no wait IS the band's God. 

"Don't know, just for a couple of weeks?" He said slowly as we exchanged keys. 

"Hey! Stop fighting you idiots, you're on in two minutes." Pete yelled walking through the door. 

Steve and Mike jumped up off the floor still pushing each other around. 

I stuffed Dio's keys in my pocket and stood as we all gathered around Pete. Joining in on the shoving with the others. 

Pete grinned shaking his head amused. "Ok you all know what to do, knock their socks off and make those girls swoon." He slapped me on the back for the last bit. 

He looked at his watch then up at us. "Paws in!" We all stuck our fists in the middle. "Timber Wolves!" He shouted pumping his hand in the air.

We all through our heads back and howled before walking down the hallway laughing still pushing and shoving each other. No matter how much fun this all was I could still feel my stomach churning. 

*~*~*~*~*

I stood on the pitch-black stage; the voices of my band mates in my earphone informed me that they were in place. "Ready?" I muttered into the tiny microphone on my cheek. 

My band wolf-howled. I grinned. "Let's go." 

A single spotlight shone on the stage. The audience fell silent. I stepped forward into the light to the microphone standing there and gave them a devil-may-care smile. As if I'd just hit the volume control the crowd started to scream wildly. I did exactly what I'd been trained to do, I laughed flicking a strand of hair casually out of my eyes then started playing my guitar. On cue the guys joined in. The stage lights flashed on bathing the once pitch-black stage in flashing light and showing the huge screen behind us showing several different images, ranging from shots of the band to funky light patterns. I gave the crowd another smile and started to sing.

Hey you, 

Are you in there? 

I'm stuck outside you, ooh 

We could use, 

One another 

Another like you, ooh 

You be my passerby 

I'll be yournew, one to pass through 

Screws inside 

Turned so tight 

Turning on you 

I'm hanging on you, ooh, ooh

Baby blue

(Baby blue)

Don't go nowhere 

(Don't go nowhere)

I'm right beside you, ooh 

Me and you 

(Me and you)

Going nowhere

(Going nowhere) 

I'm right beside you, ooh 

You be my passerby 

I'll be your new, one to pass through 

Screws inside 

Turned so tight 

Turning on you 

I'm hanging on you 

Taking you as low as you go

As low as you go

Taking you as low as you go

As low as you go

Ooh, ooh, ooh

You be my passerby

I'll be your new, one to pass through

Screws inside

Turned so tight

Turning on you

I'm hanging on you

Taking you as low as you go

(Low as you go)

As low as you go

(Low as you go)

Taking you as low as you go

(Low as you go)

As low as you go

(Aslow as you go)

(Low as you go)

(As low as you go)

(Low as you go)

(As low as you go)

(Low as you go)

Ooh, ooh.

Taking you as low as you go

As low as you go

Taking you as low as you go

As low as you go

Taking you as low as you go

(Low as you go)

As low as you go

(Low as you go)

Taking you as low as you go

(Low as you go)

As low as you go

(Aslow as you go)

Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

I brought my fingers across the strings one last time and stopped. 

The crowds screams were deafening, I smiled as the churning in my stomach disappeared. "Timber Wolves!" Dio shouted waving his hand in the air. 

The crowd started to howl. I laughed before bringing my head back and joining in. 

*~*~*~*~*

I hate fashion shows, sure when people think about it they think. Looks simple enough, just people strutting their stuff walking down the catwalk. Behind the scenes it's hectic. Different designers running around almost in tears because of things that went wrong with their designs. Either that or the models walking around complaining about what they have to wear or unsure how to fix their minor problems. I sighed ducking into the ladies bathroom to get away from the noise. Only to be greeted by another designer who was nervously puffing on a cigarette next to the small window. She looked at me as if frightened I'd ask her a question, I smiled and leaned my head against the door, I could hear the background music and the voice announcing the designer of the current fashion being shown. 

I took a deep breath and went back into the chaos. 

"Mimi! Thank god I found you. There are two kids playing tag in the dressing room!" Someone shouted latching her hand onto my arm and dragging me towards the dressing room. 

Once we got there I dislodged my arm from her grip and told her to go help Sharon who was currently surrounded by complainers and pushed the door open. All of the models were standing around the edge of the room watching in horror as a boy that couldn't be any older than 2 sat bawling as another boy of about 9 sat next to him looking around for help. I clucked my tongue, annoyed. "Hey some of you are almost on why aren't you doing anything?" 

The models jumped to action completely ignoring the children. I sat down next to them. The older boy looked at me alarmed. I frowned his black hair was styled in spikes and he was wearing one of my designs. That meant he was one of my models. "What happened?" I asked. 

"Ben tripped over, I don't know what's wrong with him." He said.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out my keys holding them in front of Ben and jiggled them around. The toddler stopped crying instantly and looked at the keys suspiciously before giggling and taking them from my hand jingling them around. 

I carefully picked him up gesturing for the other boy to follow me. 

I went to a quiet room and sat down. The boy sat across from me and watched me. "What is your name?" I asked after a while. 

"Sean." He said reluctantly. 

"I'm Mimi," He nodded. "I was told that you and your brother, were playing tag in the dressing room." 

Sean's eyes widened. "No, Ben got away from me and ran in there I was trying to get him back before he caused trouble." 

I nodded smiling to calm him down. "I believe you. Where's your mother?" 

"She's the announcer, she said I was to take care of Ben do my walk on the catwalk and then wait for the end of the show." He said. 

"Isn't your turn up soon?" I asked.

He looked panicked. 

"How about I take care of Ben while you go?" I suggested.

Sean nodded his head several times then bolted out of the room. 

I sighed turning my head to talk to Ben. "I better get something really great after all this." Ben giggled and hit my nose with my keys. 

*~*~*~*~*

I relaxed my grip on the guitar neck. The crowd's cheers deafening. I flicked my hair out of my eyes and turned to grin at the guys. I turned back to the crowd. 

"Hey, on behalf of Timber Wolves I'd like to thank you for coming here and supporting us. Hope to see you all next time we're here. Take care, Alright." I said. 

With that we walked off stage, where Pete was waiting with a couple of water bottles. 

"Great show guys you get tomorrow off, then a band day then we're off to San Francisco." He piped. 

I accepted the offered bottle. Watching as Mike and Steve started shoving each other again, knowing I was completely safe from their antics purely because I still had my guitar strapped on. 

Dio grinned probably knowing exactly what I was thinking. I shrugged smiling. 

"So Matt, are you going to put your magical guitar in the car or must I break the contract and take it?" 

I feigned horror. "If someone without my skill touches this guitar it will lose it's magic." 

Mike grinned. "So any bum can touch it?" 

I frowned. "No only rich bums." Pete, Mike and Steve laughed then walked away saying they had plans. I carefully placed the famous instrument in its case before gingerly handing it to Dio. 

He rolled his eyes, "God Matt, you're acting like you're giving me your first born child to sacrifice. Chill ok I'm gonna put it in the boot of your car and I won't open it again until you're there. Ok?" By the end of this we were standing at the exit door. 

I shrugged uncomfortably. "Its not that I don't trust you, I just don't trust the crowds outside." Dio laughed. 

"So the wolves have been set loose tonight. I have a hot date, what plans does the mighty Matt Ishida have for tonight? Several women and a large hotel bed?" He said placing his hand on the doorknob. 

I shrugged. "Probably go find a bar and drink myself under the table."

Dio frowned looking at me for a second. "Sounds like fun, don't overdo it though." Dio murmured pulling the door open before I could tell him off, to show hundreds of suddenly screaming women. "You know Matt," He muttered under his breath, "If you go first they'll swamp around you and follow you, leaving a pathway for me to safely take your guitar to your car without it receiving any damage." He gave me an innocent look while holding my precious guitar in front of him like a shield. 

I growled moving in front of him closer to the rapidly getting louder mob of women with hands stretched out towards me like claws. "I'm not protecting you, just the guitar, remember that." I didn't want to hear whatever thing he was about to say so I stepped into the mob. 

"Hi, yeah thanks all for coming here to say hi, um, but I have to get to my motorbike." I shouted over the screams trying to not get carried away with the mob. Someone was screaming in my left ear asking for my autograph and someone was screaming in my right about wanting to have my child. _Complete maniacs! And they're all attracted to me-Hey someone just pinched my butt! _I spun around on reflex to be greeted by several extremely pleased women. I took a deep breath and turned back around trying to push through the crowd. "OK! Listen to me NOW!" I yelled. Very slowly the mob fell silent. I could see Dio sitting on the car bonnet watching happily, with no guitar… "I will kiss the first person to bring me Dio's hat!" 

A suddenly the mob around me surged past me running straight towards my now horrified backup guitarist. I whistled casually before striding towards the silver and black motorbike. I swung my leg over it settling down turning on the engine. I turned to see the mob turning back and charging towards me a girl of about 16 clutching Dio's hat to her chest. I smiled seeing a stunned messy looking Dio slide into the car and speed away. 

The girl with the hat presented the hat shyly. I smiled gesturing to her. She leaned forward. I kissed her on the cheek and whispered "Thanks, hope you liked the show." She smiled and nodded. I pulled on my blue shades and started revving the engine. "MATT! I have his belt!" Someone screamed. I laughed taking off leaving the mob behind. 

I drove around for a little while before finding what I was looking for. Then parked and walked into the bar slipping the bouncer a fifty to quicken the process and seated myself right in front of the bartender. "I'll have a whatever your strongest drink is and lots of it." He smirked and poured a shot glass of some sort of amber liquid. I nodded downing it in one. "I think I'll need the bottle." I said slowly. 

*~*~*~*~*

I felt elevated. Our designs had won Sharon and I had gotten first prize. 

Where did we go to celebrate? One of LA's rowdiest bars, where it took us slightly less than an hour to get in and Sharon less than a minute to have a guy and less than 10 seconds to be swept away to the dance floor. I felt like laughing the world was a great place. I practically skipped over to the bar and sat down. 

"Hi I'd like a vodka on the rocks please." I said bobbing my head to the music. 

I turned noticing the guy sitting next to me. To say he was hot was an understatement. He was wearing black jeans and a black leather jacket over a light blue button up shirt with electric blue shades hooked on his pocket. His golden hair was in some places barely brushing his broad shoulders in long length-varying spikes. In front of him was a half-empty bottle of some hard looking liquor. To his credit he didn't look drunk.

He turned his head to look at me with impossibly electric blue eyes in his left ear was a small bright blue stone. I smiled at him trying not to get lost in those eyes. 

His amazing eyes quickly flicked down and back up –obviously checking me out- before coming back to rest on mine. He grinned with perfectly white teeth. He opened his mouth to say something then froze. He shook his head slowly and turned back to his drink. I pursed my lips wondering what just happened and turned back to my drink.

*~*~*~*~*

I'd been sitting here slowly getting drunk. Successfully dodging every single female who asked me to dance feeling quite pleased at how well I was going and then she sat there. I felt someone staring at me and I turned to find a woman with long chestnut hair, a beautiful elfin face with cinnamon brown eyes wearing tight black pants and a red top that showed her soft creamy stomach. All in all she was exquisite. 

I opened my mouth to start up a conversation. _What about not being a playboy!? _My mind screamed at me. I froze closing my mouth. _But she looks so perfect! _Some rebelling part of my mind reasoned. I shook my head clearing all thoughts and poured myself another glass. _If I'm lucky she'll finish her drink and leave. _

"Hey there, sexy thing, why don't you shake that butt my way?" A male voice slurred. 

I frowned. _He's not exactly well informed in pick up lines is he? _My mind said vaguely. 

"No that's ok I still have to finish my drink." The enchantress murmured, her alone voice would have made angels, devils and any other cosmic being fall into euphoria. 

"You can finish your drink later, sweetness. I want to dance." The drunk insisted. 

__

I can't stand guys that don't get the hint. I may not be the poster boy of treating ladies right but I know when they don't want my attention. I spun my stool so I was facing them and quickly pulled the Enchantress over so she was sitting across my legs. 

"Hey babe, I've been waiting for you. What took you so long?" I drawled. She looked startled. I brought my lips down to her ear watching the drunk over her head. 

"Just play along and I'll get you out of this." I whispered.

She relaxed leaning against my chest. "Oh you know me, just making myself beautiful for you." She laughed placing a warm hand on my cheek and leaning her forehead against mine. I smiled; this girl was a great actor. The drunk mumbled something and walked away. 

*~*~*~*~*

I slowly slid off my rescuer's legs back onto my seat, smiling at him. 

"I better stick with you tonight otherwise he might find out we were lying." 

He laughed pushing some bangs out of his eyes in what looked like a reflex; the hair just fell back into place. "Sorry, for sentencing you to die of boredom." He picked up his glass and emptied it before filling it again. 

I watched as he drank it in one again. "I'm sure you're not that boring." 

He smiled, carefully pouring another glass. 

"Can I have some?" I asked trying to get his attention off drinking that glass. 

He frowned then handed it over. I raised it to my lips and took a tiny sip. The liquid burned all the way down to my stomach sending me into a fit of coughs and him into a fit of laughter. I put the glass down still choking. 

"Here." He handed me a glass of water. Which I drank instantly, still spluttering.

"How can you drink that stuff?" I choked. 

He laughed quietly. "Practice." I reached over taking the bottle away from him. 

"I think you should dance with me." I said matter-of-factly. Then took his hand and lead him to the dance floor. 

*~*~*~*~*

The girl held onto my hand leading me to the middle of the crowd of dancers. Then turned and wrapped her arms loosely around my neck. I sighed and wrapped mine around her waist, allowing myself to be pulled into the music by this siren. 

"So do you live in LA?" I asked after a while. She shook her head slightly from its position resting on my chest. 

"I'm here on business. I live in New York." She murmured. "You?"

I shrugged. "Here on business, I travel a lot I usually live in Japan." 

"Really? I used to live there." She looked up into my eyes. 

I smiled. Moving one hand to point at myself. "Matt." 

She blinked then smiled. "I'm Mimi." 

I frowned, something nagging at me from behind the drunken haze in my mind. I stopped dancing and looked down at her excited. "Mimi Tachikawa?"

She sighed. "Yes that's me, look I was having a great time before you knew my name, I'm not planning on giving you my autograph so can we just forget who I am?" 

I laughed, letting go of her waist to hold my stomach, leaning against a nearby wall. 

"What's so funny?" She muttered hands on her hips. 

I tried to stop laughing. Finally I stood up still in silent spasms of laughter and said. "Yamato Ishida at your service." 

Her mouth dropped open and she stood there stunned. "Matt?" 

I nodded smirking. 

"Oh my god! We have to go somewhere to catch up. Are you planing anything else tonight?" She asked practically jumping up and down. 

I shook my head. 

Mimi turned and bolted over to a redhead and started gesturing towards me. The redhead turned to look at me and winked. Suddenly Mimi was back beside me calmer than before. "Come on lets go for a walk." 

*~*~*~*~*

Matt and I left the bar walking hand in hand. "So where are we going?" He asked. 

I shrugged feeling excitement surge through me. "Not a clue." 

He smiled down at me causing strands of shiny golden hair to fall over his amazing blue eyes. "There's a little park nearby my hotel." He said then swiped at his hair pushing it away. He let go of my hand and walked over to a wicked looking motorbike. He flashed me another smile and swung his leg over it, sitting down. 

I quickly settled down behind him letting out as shriek and wrapping my hands around his waist as the bike gave a sudden loud roar and started to tear down the road. I pressed my cheek against his back inhaling a mixture of leather, cologne and the unexplainable, unbeatable hint of him. I sighed letting my eyes flicker shut. 

When the motorbike suddenly stopped and Matt just sat there I wondered what he was waiting for. I felt a low rumble in his chest as he started to laugh an incredibly sexy laugh. He stopped but I could still feel it through his back. 

"So Mimi, you gonna get off the bike or are you content to just fall asleep with your arms around me? If that's the case we should at least get to the ground first." He said without a trace of laughter in his voice. I blushed sliding off the bike. He grinned, shutting off the engine and joined me on the footpath. 

I looked at the park across from the hotel he'd stopped at, soft green grass a couple of trees and a large man-made waterfall and pond. Matt looked at me a permanent grin on his face he held his arm out to me. I took his arm wondering why my heart was working overtime. He led me down to the pond and pulled off his jacket throwing it onto the grass. He promptly collapsed down on the ground lying with his well-muscled arms behind his head. I sighed yet another feature of Yamato Ishida adding up to the fact he should have a parade running in front of him screaming warnings, just so women could have a chance to escape the death trap. I lay down on the grass beside him stared at the clouds. 

"So Mimi, heard from Sora that you've moved from actor to fashion designer." He said slowly. 

I nodded "You'd still be in your band." 

He laughed. "Yeah have too much money, and millions of women after my body."

__

Who can blame them? My traitorous mind murmured. 

"Oh come on be serious." I said rolling my eyes. 

"Mimi, I am always serious and I always speak the truth." He was watching me with those beautiful eyes.

*~*~*~*~*

"So if you always tell the truth, is it true that you dated Brittany Spears?" She asked smiling.

"Nah I just took her to the highest room in my castle and had my way with her."

She stared at me shocked. 

I laughed, "No we're friends, nothing like that, I did take her to my 'castle' but that was to stash my guitar before we hit a party. So my turn. Did you really punch another actor?"

"He came on to me! It was self-defense. Why is it always brought up?" She mumbled. 

I laughed again. "Because it's funny."

She frowned. "Is it true that you're a playboy?" 

I stopped laughing and went quiet. She looked over at me. I closed my eyes. "What do you think?" I muttered. _God why did she have to bring that up?_

After a moment she said. "I think, you were, but you don't want to anymore, from the rumors I've heard it was a different girl every night for you, but I doubt your way of picking up a girl involves getting drunk." I didn't say anything. "But I don't see how anyone could go for you," she stated, "You may look good but you only seem to be able to tease people." 

I opened my eyes and laughed. "Are you making fun of my personality?" 

She smiled. "No I'd never make fun, I'm always serious and I always tell the truth." 

A grin grew on my face. "Ok that's it Tachikawa, your going down! My ego demands it." In a flash I was on top of her tickling ruthlessly. She squirmed screaming wildly. 

"Give up princess?" I asked. She nodded laughing louder. I stopped leaning back, my knees which were either side of her hips. For a moment we both stared at each other then, it started to rain. I rolled off her and got up pulling on my jacket. Mimi pulled herself off the ground already soaked. I started to run towards Dio's bike then felt my foot slip on the wet grass. I fell to the ground, landing on my back. Mimi couldn't help herself I must of had a look of pure surprise on my face, she started to laugh. I glared at her. 

Mimi started to run towards the street. I got up and ran after her following her shrieks of laughter. When she got to the footpath she looked around obviously wondering where to run. In a flash I scooped her up in my arms and jogged into my hotel. She pounded against my chest still laughing. I stopped in front of my door gently putting her down as she leaned against my chest still laughing. 

*~*~*~*~*

I stopped laughing as our eyes met I suddenly realised that I'd been leaning on his chest for support, one of his arms holding me in a hug, my head tilted up his head tilted down. He had a soft smile on his lips, _Oh how I want to taste those lips._ I slowly stood on my tiptoes and kissed him. _I'm kissing Yamato Ishida, my childhood friend, a singer in a band that was always moving and an extremely sexy guy. _

Matt's arms circled around my bare midriff leaving fire wherever skin met skin. He held me against him when my legs gave out, as he continued to explore my mouth I lost what little control I had left over my senses. I finally broke the kiss in need of air. Matt continued, kissing along my jaw line slowly then started on my neck. I tangled my fingers in his soft blond hair, arching my neck for better access. 

"So." He whispered moving his attention to the other side of my neck. "What does."

His fingers were tracing circles on my lower back. "Mimi." I tried to remember how to breathe. "Have to say." He nibbled gently on my earlobe. "About me now?" He pulled his head back staring with his beautiful electric blue eyes sparkling mischievously into mine a smile in place. I moaned at the sudden lose of attention. His smile grew.

*~*~*~*~*

"Mimi there's an old lady staring at us with a disgusted look." I said amused. Mimi seemed to not care slowly slipping her hands inside my jacket toying with the buttons on my shirt. "She's going towards the receptionist's office." My shirt was hanging open. Her fingertips running up and down my chest leaving trails of fire. I let out a soft moan as she leaned entirely on me to bring her mouth back up to mine, at the same time coming into contact with something the was very aware of what was happening. 

She smiled her beautiful brown eyes shining and brought her lips bare millimeters away from mine. I tilted my head bringing our lips into contact and she pulled back regaining the distance. I tried again to get the same result, her breath driving me insane. 

"Mimi!" I moaned. 

She giggled. Never had a laugh sounded so…sexy to me till that point. I brought one hand up to play in her long chestnut hair the other slowly rubbing up and down her side. She moved her hands so they were running down my back under my shirt. I moved my head again pleased she'd finally decided to stop teasing me, relishing the softness of her mouth. I moved my hand to the base of her neck playing with the tendrils of hair, before pulling back. 

"That lady went to complain…" I explained. She emitted a low growl that didn't help my control at all. _I'm not gonna make her do anything, she's not just anyone, she's a friend. _"Coffee, I need some coffee." I mumbled. _I need to get rid of the alcohol in my system or god knows what I'll do next. _Mimi nodded and we both went into my room. 

*~*~*~*~*

Matt strode over to a coffee machine busying himself in making himself a drink. I shivered suddenly realising my clothes were soaked. He turned around suddenly looking concerned. "Sorry Mimi I forgot we're soaked. We'd better get out of our clothes." As if he suddenly realised what he'd just said his eyes went wide and he turned back around. I smiled no longer feeling cold. 

"Um… do you want so coffee?" he mumbled not turning around. 

"No thanks." I said cheerfully, sitting down on one of the chairs, Matt threw his leather jacket onto the floor and grabbed his coffee before sitting across from me. He's forgotten to button up his shirt again so his well-built chest was showing.

He sipped his coffee. "So you been in touch with any of the gang?" He asked. 

I shook my head. "No but I'm visiting Tai and Sora this week." 

He smiled. "Watch out for Chikara, she'll steal your heart in a minute and have you buying her presents whenever she wants." 

I smiled. "Thanks for the warning. I'll be sure to tell Sora." 

He laughed. "She already thinks I'm gonna adopt her only child." 

"You know Matt I haven't seen you for almost ten years, first I had to move to America, then when I'd finally graduated and went back to Japan you'd already left for college in Canada." I said wishing I had something to do with my hands.

Matt shrugged. "Canada has an awesome music college, I met Dio, Steve and Mike there. Nothing much happened before I left Japan." 

"Yeah sure, I come back and Sora and Tai are pretty much attached. Something must have happened." I insisted. 

Matt cleared his throat. "Sora and I started going out about a year after you left, then broke up the day before I left for Canada." 

His blue eyes flicked up off the floor and locked on mine. 

*~*~*~*~*

We just stared at each other. I placed my half-full cup on the table. Somehow I knew I wouldn't be able to drink for much longer. Mimi's long chestnut hair had turned a darker shade from the rain and her top had melded itself to her following her every curve like a fascinated lover and her pants were like a second skin. Her brown eyes sparkled. While I stared at her two voices screamed at each other in my mind. _She's beautiful! Make your move! _One screamed. _She's your friend! You don't want to hurt her! _Yelled the other. I just stared at her. 

She was watching me with her cinnamon eyes. Her eyes were taking in every feature. It was obvious; probably as obvious as the way my eyes were checking her out. There was this tension filling the room making it hard for me to breathe. I remembered the feel of her soft skin under my hands, the warmth that had surged into me like a bolt of lightning. I could imagine the softness of her body under mine. Just the thought sent a tingle through my body. I could still taste her on my lips. Her scent still haunted me. My imagination was on overload adding all of the sensations together. I fought to breathe as my throat seized up, refusing to allow my lungs free access to air. She just sat there looking absolutely amazing with those sparkling brown eyes. 

I stood up suddenly and kicked the coffee table out of the way all of its contents sprawling across the floor. Mimi had also stood up and was watching me with her sparkling eyes and beautiful smile in place. We dove at each other meeting together with a frenzied kiss. I held her against me running my hands over her skin. Her hands were preoccupied tangling themselves in my hair holding my head just where she wanted it. I wasn't going to complain my mouth was too busy to complain. I quickly scooped her up in my arms not breaking our contact and carried her into my bedroom. Gently laying her on the bed she moved her hands away from my hair and began tugging at my shirt. I shifted my arms allowing her to pull it off. My hands found the bottom of her shirt and I slowly pulled it off. 

*~*~*~*~*

Sorry for taking so long I've been on holidays. If you spot any mistakes, have any comments or suggestions please feel free to tell me. 


	3. In the Mourning

Disclaimer: Obviously the characters don't belong to me or I wouldn't be writing this disclaimer.

Chapter 3 **In the 'Mourning'**

I opened my eyes to be greeted with a pounding headache…and of course a pair of warm arms circling my chest. I stared at them then slowly turned to see whom the arms belonged to. Mimi's perfect head was resting on the pillow. "Shit." I mumbled then carefully eased myself out of her arms and went to the shower. 

I turned on the hot water giving it a minute before getting in. I leaned my head against the wall letting the hot water remove all the tension from my body. I reached out for the shampoo and squirted a decent amount onto my hand; I let my hands rub it into my hair as my thoughts lingered on last night. _I'm an idiot; I can't believe what I did. _I reached out for the conditioner waiting for all of the shampoo to wash out then repeated the process. After a while I turned off the water and stepped out grabbing a towel and drying myself off. I looked around for my clothes and mentally kicked myself. They were out there with her… I wrapped the towel around my hips and opened the door. 

Mimi was just finishing slipping her shirt on. She looked up at me with her happy eyes. I walked over to my grab my bag. She sidled over to me and pecked me on the cheek. "Morning sexy." She said. I smiled at her. She wrapped her arms around me. "Love you." She whispered. I froze. _Love?_ She looked up at me looking concerned. 

"Matt?" she asked. 

I took a step away from her. _Love? I'm not sure if I'm in love with her, lust, yes but love? I've never been in love before. _ "Mimi, I'm not sure that what we did last night was right. I was drunk and it shouldn't have happened." I said slowly. 

Mimi took a step back as if she'd been slapped. Tears filled her beautiful eyes. "I wasn't drunk." 

"That doesn't count…" I started. 

Mimi's face contorted into a look of anger and pure revulsion. "Oh of course it doesn't count, women fall over themselves to get a piece of Matt Ishida. You can just reach out and pick one on random." 

"That's not what I meant." I mumbled. _What did I mean?_

"No fault ever falls on Matt Ishida. You know what you believe you're so perfect, believe me you're far from perfect." She yelled. 

"NO!" I yelled. "You don't get it!" 

Mimi jerked back again.

"Who was I kidding thinking you could love me? With your perfect body and your smile… It's all a game to you. You probably go for records or something 'I had Mimi hooked after 5 seconds' those magazines missed something, they forgot to add uncaring bastard to playboy." She shouted, her beautiful brown eyes shimmering with tears. "I wish I'd never seen you again." With that she stormed out the door. 

I stared motionlessly at the door. I felt completely numb. I kneeled down to retrieve my bag and pulled out some clothes, quickly changing into them. I walked back into the bathroom and stared at my reflection in the mirror. My hair was mussed up which would usually send me into a panicked search for a comb. My face had taken on a blank mask. I slowly raised a comb to my hair and set it in its usual style. Dead eyes stared back at me. _She said she loved me…she was so perfect…and I just made her feel like one of those girls…used once then thrown away…She was so warm…_

I could still feel her hands on my skin, I could still smell her and I could still taste her. The comb dug into my hand as I clenched my fist. _She was so perfect and see what you did to her! You destroyed her… you tainted her. You…_ "Asshole!" I slammed my fist into the mirror shattering it into pieces, not feeling the glass tear into my skin. 

"You fucking asshole!" I shouted stalking out of the bathroom grabbing the first thing I saw and threw it across the room. I proceeded to thrash my room. 

I growled grabbing my jacket and kicked my door open. A maid looked at me shocked. I pointed at my door. "I want my room to be left alone until my friend Dio arrives tell him to take my stuff with him." I snarled turning my hand to point under her nose. "I want you to tell him personally." The maid had gone cross-eyed staring at my bloodied hand. I quickly hid it behind my back. She nodded slowly. I walked past her no longer caring, hurtling myself onto Dio's bike and tearing down the road. 

*~*~*~*~*

I'd been driving for hours straight. The night sky was matching my mood; dark cloud covering every single star, giving off the sense that a storm was about to start. I pulled up at a red light and considered seeing how I'd end up if I rammed into the truck going past. 

"Hey! You're Matt Ishida! From Timber Wolves! You guys rock!" Someone called. I turned to look at the guy. He must have been about 18 and he was driving a mini van with others of about that age. I smiled on reflex, Pete would have been proud of me. 

"Yeah, that's me." I said flicking my eyes over the people in the car. 

"Hey, you wanna come to a party? It'll be awesome!" A girl asked. 

I shrugged. _Party, alcohol and drugs... temporary amnesia… Being able to forget how warm Mimi felt. _"Yeah sure. Lead on." 

*~*~*~*~*

I leaned my head on the plane window. Staring into space. Refusing to think about _him_. I had to put on a happy face. I was finally getting to see Sora and Tai again. The man sitting next to me had blond hair and blue eyes. Nothing in comparison to _his _but they kept making me think about _him. _The man smiled at me suggestively. I frowned at him. He seemed to have _his _confidence as well. He looked annoyed and looked away. I continued to stare out the window hoping that when I got to Japan I'd have something happen so I could forget about last night. I closed my eyes refusing to cry. This was going to be a long flight. 

*~*~*~*~*

I'd forgotten how many drinks I'd had, how many of those pills being offered to me. The music was so loud it should override any thoughts. There were so many lights flashing on and off. Bodies everywhere. I could still feel her, smell her and taste her. Someone wrapped their arms around my neck. A leggy blond with curves in all the right places exactly the type I usually went for. She pressed her lips against mine. I shuddered at how empty it felt. I pushed her away. I had no idea how many drinks or pills I'd had, but it obviously wasn't enough.

*~*~*~*~*

I staggered out of the mini van managing to stand with a noticeable waver. The car door slammed behind me and with a screech of tires and a couple of almost understandable good-byes drove away. I waited till the loud music and laughter faded into the background. I turned bringing on a sudden wave of dizziness and suddenly found myself lying on the ground. I laughed uncontrollably and got unsteadily to my feet. I stumbled towards the front stairs. I lifted one unsteady leg up and had to grab the railing to avoid toppling over again. I clutched the railing with both hands and slowly and painfully brought one leg at a time up to the next step with a loud thump. 

After a long, long time, I reached the door. I attempted to stand up straight and look as presentable as a drunk/stoned guy could, realised I was still laughing from my first fall, instantly stopping and reached for the doorbell. _You idiot! _My mind crowed.As I reached, I slowly tipped forward and smacked my head against the hard wooden door; hand still pressed against the doorbell letting off a continuous peel of bells. I fought back my laughter as I leaned helplessly on the door. I heard a sudden click and the door swung open dropping me onto the floor inside. The laughter I'd been trying to suppress broke free and I lay there laughing into the hard wooden floor. I rolled over and looked up at the shadowed figure then at the baseball bat above her head and laughed harder. 

"You going to hit me with that bat Yolie?" I choked "Cause right now I could go for one right between my eyes." I let out another choking laugh and vomited all over her floor. 

Yolie flung the bat away and dropped down to her knees. "Matt!" She yelped. She knew my voice too well; you didn't run the record company that the Timber Wolves had a contract with without knowing my voice off by heart. I gave a ragged gasp and wiped my mouth with my sleeve. Yolie carefully helped me to stand leading me to the bathroom, where I proceeded to bring up every meal I'd ever had. 

Yolie was perched on the sink ready to leap up if I fell. I struggled to my feet smiling shakily. "Great to see you again, told you I'd visit." I said weaving slightly. She jumped to her feet pushing her long violet hair out of her face and held me up.

"Matt you look awful!" She cried. I looked up at her behind her was a large mirror. An unshaven man with slack pale skin, scruffy blond hair and bloodshot blue eyes glared back at me. I turned away from him in disgust, tripping over my own feet. Yolie was there instantly catching me. She looked worried. I tried to smile "Don't worry bout me." And reached out my hand to tweak her nose to prove I was acting normal, hoping to see her smile again.

She jerked back and gasped. "Matt! What happened to your hand?" I looked at my hand confused. My hand was stained with dry blood deep gashes ran all over and imbedded in my flesh were blood red pieces of glass. I clenched my fist causing the glass to drive deeper, pain flooded through my fogged up brain. _You deserve it! _

Yolie reached out and grabbed my hand forcing it open. "Matt?" I clenched my hand again. "Matt! Stop it." I reluctantly unclenched my fist. Yolie fussed over my hand then pushed the toilet seat down and sat me down. I watched her blankly. She rummaged through a draw and turned around with a pair of tweezers. She kneeled on the floor next to me and took my hand. She looked up at me through her glasses. "This is gonna hurt, it would help if you started talking. Preferably about what happened." She said choosing a piece of glass that had imbedded itself between my first two knuckles and giving it a quick tug. Then looked up at me concerned.

I shrugged. _I deserve whatever pain I get. _"I punched a mirror." I said finally. 

Yolie looked up at me shocked then tried to pull on a goofy smile. "Have you developed eisotropophobia?" She asked. 

I stared at her blankly. 

She sighed busying herself with my hand. "It's fear of mirrors."

I shook my head distantly amused. "More like a hate of mirrors." 

"You mean it was one that showed your hair all messy and made you look fat?" She joked. 

I just stared. 

"Ok, I'm sorry I joke when I'm really nervous you've rubbed off on me." She muttered plucking out a particularly long and jagged shard. 

"I punched the mirror because I hate myself and at that point I wanted to kill my own reflection." I muttered. I could tell Yolie wanted the whole story, I couldn't lie to her. "I was attempting to give up being a playboy, I went out to a bar and was quite contently getting smashed, pleased with myself because I'd dodged every attempt of dancing. Then Mimi turned up. Have you seen her lately? It's no wonder she's an actress. We had no idea who we were talking to. We flirted a bit than after a while I worked out who she was and told her who I was…Then we went to the park and then my hotel room and…" I broke off as my throat let out a choking sob. 

Yolie looked up at me with wide eyes. "Matt…you didn't" 

I looked away taking on a distant voice. "Next morning I was so confused. I'm not used to being in the same room as them when they wake up I'm usually out of there without a note if possible. She told me she loved me… I've never been in love, you know me, how it takes me so long to make friends… and I made her feel like one of those girls…" I clenched my fist again driving a half removed shard back into my flesh. 

Yolie grabbed my hand and started to pull the shard out again. 

I raised my spare hand to cover my eyes. "I can't forget her…even now, I can still remember everything about her, the way she'd smile, her laugh, how her eyes just sparkled... her personality just drew me towards her," I choked a laugh. "I'm full of alcohol and drugs and I can still taste and feel her lips." 

Yolie was staring at me. I leaned down and caught her lips with mine then pulled away with a short bitter laugh. She looked at me surprised. 

"See! Nothing works compared to her everything is cold and lifeless." I moaned. 

Yolie gently closed my hand and looked me right in the eyes. "Matt, I think you've just described love, and because of your current condition I'll ignore the cold and lifeless thing." She stood up and chucked the glass into the bin and washed her hands and the tweezers. 

I stared at her as she helped me to stand and washed my hand. 

"You'll have to see a doctor in the morning and get your hand stitched up." She turned to look at me. "Now that you have discovered love I think you should tell her." 

I closed my eyes in pain. "You don't understand what happened, I don't think she wants to see me again. Ever." I felt tears run down my face.

Yolie wrapped her arms around me. "I'm sorry. It'll be ok. You'll see." 

*~*~*~*~*

Tai was in the backyard playing with Chikara. I smiled watching as he scooped her up and started to spin in circles to Chikara's screaming delight. _I wonder if Matt would make a good father. _I jerked my head back annoyed that he'd again somehow crept back into my thoughts. I turned to look at Sora, who was also watching Tai and Chikara play. 

"Sora," I said slowly.

She turned her head instantly paying me complete attention. 

"You and Matt…you dated at some point…didn't you?" I asked shifting uncomfortably. _Oh yeah sure! Not gonna think about him are you! _

Sora looked surprised. "Well yeah, for two and a half years." She carefully placed her empty glass on the table. "Why?"

__

Yeah, why Mimi? What's he matter to you? "Just curious, two and a half years is obviously a long time, and yet years down the track you're married to Tai. Just curious." _Just jealous._

"Well you know, after the Digitalworld, Matt, Tai and I became really good friends. Matt and I were especially close, always hanging out, teasing each other. After a while people started to think we were going out, everyone, even Tai. So it just fell into place. We'd both noticed how people insisted on how good a couple we made, and we just started going out. No awkward silences or getting tongue-tied. We acted just the same still hanging out and teasing, but somehow we'd decided that everyone thought we were a couple so we should be." Sora said sheepishly. 

I leaned back in my chair sipping at my drink.

"All through school, Matt and I were the couple everyone wanted to be. Our dates weren't that different to how we used to hang out, maybe a couple of occasional kisses and we held hands but I think we just fell into the idea that we were a couple." Sora laughed. "We even got voted Prom King and Queen. When we got to the point of choosing which college to go to Matt got a scholarship for a major music college in Canada. That night he took me out to dinner and at the end of meal he said something along the lines of. 'We've never really been more than best friends, all this couple stuff that we've been putting up with is a sham. I don't think either of us wants to live like this for our entire lives. I happen to know a guy who's nuts about you.' He said some other stuff and the next day was off in Canada. It took Tai about two weeks to figure out I wasn't with Matt anymore." 

I laughed imagining how many times Tai would have asked Sora about Matt before he was sure he could go out with her.

"Now, if you don't mind I'd like to know what your sudden curiosity is about." Sora said giving me her I'm-a-mother-and-I-can-detect-lies look. 

I shivered. "I met Matt in LA." I mumbled. 

"And?" Sora asked.

I looked at the ground. 

"And?" She repeated. Then "Oh my God…Mimi?"

I nodded. 

"Are you ok? Did he pull one of his 'I'm Matt Ishida, I'm a God, all girls worship me' things?" 

I nodded again. 

Sora pulled me into a hug. "Sometimes he's just to full of himself lately. He's one of my best friends and he's always been there for us no matter what, even if the best he can do at the time is take Tai out and get him so drunk he forgets his problems for the night. And Chikara loves him. But he had no right to do that to you." 

I shrugged halfheartedly. 

"You know what we have to do? Get him out of your head. Have you seen Michael lately? He's looking good. And I know he's been asking after you. You two can hook up at Kari and TK's-" She continued to chatter on but I wasn't listening anymore. _All right Ishida, next time I see you, you'll see what you're missing out on. _I thought but somewhere in the back of my mind a tiny voice told me if I saw Matt again I'd probably crawl on my hands and knees just for him to touch me again. 

*~*~*~*~*

I looked at the clock Yolie had put next to me. 7:00. I rolled off Yolie's couch and walked into the bathroom. To say I'd slept would have made me laugh if I wasn't so tired. I showered quickly then dressed in a casual khaki shirt and dark blue pants. I glared at my reflection forcing myself not to destroy Yolie's mirror. My hand was wrapped in a temporary bandage that she'd given me that covered the gashes in my hand, which had tendencies to bleed every time I 'accidentally' banged it against something. I found a comb and gelled my hair into its usual spiky style. I stared at the beginnings of a beard I didn't have my razor, I rubbed my good hand across my chin. _It didn't look so bad…just give it a bit of a trim and…it's from the day I last saw Mimi. _I stepped away from the mirror and walked into the kitchen where Yolie sat sipping a cup of coffee. 

"Hey." I mumbled sitting across from her. 

"Hey," she yawned, "Taking you to a doctor as soon as I finish." 

I nodded completely aware that she was watching me. _Off to the doctor's to get my hand stitched up! Whoopty doo!_ "Great." 

Yolie's eyes suddenly lit up. "Oh my God! I forgot to tell you, TK proposed to Kari!" 

__

TK proposed to Kari! Whoopty doo! I stopped and processed this through my mind again. I looked up at her in shock. She smiled. 

"Why wasn't I informed? Why didn't you tell me last night?" I shouted grinning; I suddenly felt like grabbing my guitar and jamming out a couple of tunes…but I didn't have my guitar so I just smiled like a maniac. "Come on! Tell me about it!" 

"You didn't have your phone so they couldn't contact you and last night I had other things on my mind." She said dropping her cup into the sink. "I'll give you the details, in the car. Go on get! Move!" She laughed as I bolted out of the door. 

*~*~*~*~*

To the doctor's credit, he was very quiet. I held my hand out and he got all of the tiny fragments of glass that Yolie had missed out and stitched up the gashes. 

"So it was one of those typically romantic proposals. I wish I'd been there." Yolie sighed, leaning against the bench I was sitting on. 

"I'll remember that and tell your boyfriend one when I next see him, if you ever get one." I smiled purposely looking at her instead of the needle. 

She smiled. "I promised, to tell you to call TK when I found you, so you'll have to ring him later on. Oh and I called Dio, the Wolves had gone frantic looking for you." 

The doctor glanced up from my hand. "Pardon me, but when you said, Wolves, did you mean the Timber Wolves, that band?" He asked Yolie. 

Yolie smiled. "Yep, that's right." 

The doctor looked at me. "Mr. Ishida. Correct?" 

I nodded. 

"Matt Ishida, you're the lead singer in Timber Wolves?" The middle aged man seemed to be getting really excited. 

I nodded again. 

"My daughter's completely besotted with you, she has all of your CD and so many posters it's surprising I didn't recognise you in the first place. Could I get your autograph for her? Her name's Emily." He grabbed a notebook and his pen.

I smiled. "I'd love to, but first can you finish with my hand?"

He laughed and picked up his needle again. 

*~*~*~*~*

"Hey Ishida, got you a present." Pete said as he walked into the room followed by Mike, Steve and Dio. I looked up and grinned. Yolie gave me a brief hug and left the lounge room. I caught the bag Pete threw me and pulled out a pair of midnight blue fingerless leather gloves. I looked up at him shocked.

He ran his hand through his brown hair and smiled ruefully. "Don't want to start anymore rumors. Not good for publicity. The way I see it, the gloves will cover your stitches and because they don't have fingers they won't effect your playing." He turned and walked into the kitchen where Yolie was. 

I looked at my band mates confused. 

Steve dropped a magazine into my lap. 

"Matt Ishida, (27) the lead singer and guitarist of the Canadian band Timber Wolves, has been reported to be having a mental breakdown. For more information, turn to page 32." I looked up. "What makes them think I had a break down…well how do they know at least?" I asked chucking the magazine onto the coffee table. 

Mike and Steve shrugged. "We'd better go get your stuff from the car." 

I tugged on my new gloves and followed after them down to my car. Pete and Steve each grabbed a suitcase and carried it back up the stairs. Dio grabbed my guitar still in its case and handed it to me with a flourished bow. 

"Your precious child," He laughed, then his smile faded, "Matt, you know that maid saw your room at the hotel and probably phoned in to that magazine for some money." 

I scuffed my sneaker on the ground. "Yeah"

"Your room was pretty messed up, wanna tell me what happened?" He asked closing the boot of my car. "Cause you're my best friend and you know you can tell me anything." 

I smiled. "Yeah I know dude, but it's kinda an uncomfortable topic, ya know?" Dio stuffed his hands into his pockets. I laughed. "But it's good to know you're there for me man, and I care for you to." I teased. 

Dio laughed. "Stop you're making me blush." 

We turned to walk up the stairs. I stopped. "Dio, after the hotel room I got really drunk and I have no clue where your bike is, I'm sorry dude, I'll buy you a new one." 

Dio shrugged. "That's cool, its about time you spend some of your money, as long as you're ok munchkin." 

I laughed. 

*~*~*~*~*

"You sure you don't want me to sleep on the couch? You can have my bed." Yolie said for probably the 10th time. 

I shook my head smiling. "I'm fine, you've got that big business meeting tomorrow all I have to do is get on a plane. Now go otherwise you won't get your beauty sleep." 

Yolie gave in finally turning to walk into her room. "Night Matt." She yawned and closed her door. 

"Night." I whispered. I'd hung out with the guys for the day, was leaving for San Francisco the next morning. I'd covered my stitches with my gloves and had rang TK earlier, to make get all the details and to catch up. But now I sat alone in Yolie's lounge room. Without a single person to distract my thoughts. _Mimi…_ I shivered suddenly remembering everything again. I reached over to my guitar and eased it out of its case. I strummed across the strings softly making sure it was in tune then emptied my feelings into my guitar, playing softly enough so it wouldn't disturb Yolie but loud enough for me to hear. I let my head rest on the couch and closed my eyes letting the music carry me away. 

*~*~*~*~*

I carefully ran my razor across my cheek then washed it, wiping away the excess shaving cream. I looked up at the mirror yet again fighting off the urge to punch my reflection. My reflections newest feature was a barely noticeable beard that went just around my top lip, down to my chin and up to my bottom lip in a thin line. With one last glance to make sure my hair was fine I packed all my things into my bag and exited the bathroom. 

Yolie was holding my guitar -in its case of course- waiting for Dio to arrive to give me a lift to the airport. She laughed. "That must be a record for you. Only 45 minutes to do your hair." She stopped and squinted. She walked closer and placed her fingertips on my chin

I smiled pulling on my gloves. "What do you think? Will it make me look better or worse?" 

"Better." She carefully put down my guitar and gave me a hug. "I won't see you for a couple of months, Pete told me you have tours non stop till the wedding. So I'll see you at the wedding in three months, I can't believe it all the Digidestin together again. Kari said she invited everyone…"

I froze then grabbed her arm. She looked up at me confused. "She'll be there?" I asked. 

"Yes Mimi will be there, for god's sake Matt! You love her, she said she loved you. Do I have to spell it out for you?" She muttered, stepping away from me to glare at me without having to bend her neck awkwardly. 

I refused to let go of her arm. "You don't get it, I hurt her, out of pure stupidity I hurt her. I don't understand feelings very well and I'll most likely say something stupid and hurt her again. She doesn't deserve that." My voice broke I looked away until I felt I could handle it again. "I should leave her alone and let her get on with life."

"Sure that's what you think now but just wait till you get to the wedding," She sighed, reluctantly hugging me again. "I understand what you're talking about, but I very much doubt that you always feel this way after a one night stand." 

I pulled my arms around her a little tighter. "Thanks for being here for me." 

"I'm always here for you, you're like a brother to me." She looked up at me with concerned brown eyes. "Matt, take care of yourself, please, don't go bashing yourself up and please stay away from heavy drinking."

I pulled her back at arm length, staring right into her brown eyes. "Yolie, can you go with me to the wedding?" 

"What? Why?" She asked startled. 

"Please? I'll take care of myself if you go to the wedding with me." I begged. 

Yolie squirmed a little then nodded. "Ok. I think I understand what you're asking, I don't like it but fine."

Dio beeped the horn from outside. 

"Thanks Yolie for everything." I smiled grabbing my bags and guitar. "You promised, don't forget"

She kissed me on the cheek. "Yeah, take care ok." 

*~*~*~*~*

If you spot anything that doesn't make sense or isn't spelt properly (taking in that I'm Australian and we spell things differently) tell me please. 2 chapters to go!


	4. Wedding Bells aringing

Chapter 4 **Wedding bells a-ringing **

"Ok, hang on." A voice called. 

I continued to knock on the door. 

The door swung open. "Ok stop knocking! You know-!" Kari started. 

I grinned, swooping her off her feet and kissed her. 

"Matt!? Oh my god! Did you just arrive?" She squealed flinging her arms around my neck and kissed my cheek. "You know now I'm getting married I very much doubt TK would like you greeting me like this." 

I laughed gently dropping her to her feet. "Yeah I guess, but you'll always have a place in my heart." I fluttered my eyelashes. 

"Matt!" She laughed smacking my shoulder. She reached up and ran a finger over my beard. "I like this, I makes you look even hotter." 

I shrugged giving her nose a playful tug. "I like this it makes you look more human." 

"Thanks." She rolled her eyes and led me into the apartment. "If you're after TK then he's not here. Strictly girls only for the next two nights." 

I frowned. "Thanks for including me in your group." 

She shook her head smiling. 

"So where are all of the girls?" I asked lazing in one of the armchairs finding a bra stuffed under the cushion. I held it up smirking. 

Kari snatched it away and threw it into another room. "Sora's gone out to drop Chikara off at her grandparents, my other friends went off to get supplies. I'm not sure about Yolie and Mimi's gone out to get dinner for us." 

My stomach gave an involuntary jerk at her name. I pulled my smile back onto my face. "Yolie was on my flight. I'm her escort since we're both single losers." I lamented. 

Kari rolled her eyes. 

"She went to see her parents first. She'll be over later." I finished. 

Kari smiled. "That's great! Sorry Matt, you know you're my favorite future brother-in-law, but the no guy rule only counts if there aren't any guys. How would it look if I broke my own rule?" 

I sighed. "Just when I was getting comfy." I heaved myself out of the chair. 

Brrrrrring! Kari leapt at the phone on the bench. "Hello?"

I stood patiently. 

"What? Is there anything you can do? Are you sure? Ok fine, thanks." Kari dropped the phone and turned to face me. She looked like she was about to cry. "That was the owner of the hall we'd hired, they just found out that it's not available, termites or something, and we can't hold the reception there." She burst into tears.

I looked around for a tissue, unable to find one I pulled her into a hug and she sobbed into my shoulder. I stroked her hair slowly and tried to sound soothing. "Shhhh, it's alright. You just sob all over Matt's expensive leather jacket. It doesn't matter." I mumbled. 

Kari started to laugh in mid cry causing a sudden burst of hiccups. 

I smiled. "Hey come on, you're gonna get married in two days. You know what? You can have the reception at my house. There's plenty of room and I'll arrange it all for you. Come on, chin up give me that dazzling smile!" 

She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. "You'd do that for me?" 

I nodded using my sleeve to wipe away the stray tears. "Of course I would. Just tell me how you want my house decorated and I'll have it done."

Kari smiled and gave me a quick hug. "Thank you so much!" 

"Ok so where's my little brother?" I asked after Kari had made the call to transfer all of the decorations to my house.

Kari's smile grew.

*~*~*~*~*

I pulled out my keys cursing my stupid idea of giving TK a spare key. I pushed the door open to find my lounge room in a total mess. TK opened a bleary eye from his position on my couch. "Matt?" He asked confused.

I laughed. "Hi Teeks, always new you couldn't take your alcohol." I strode in carefully avoiding the empty bottles on the floor. "So where are your partners in crime?" I asked pointing at the bags in the corner. 

TK grimaced pulling himself up onto his feet. "If you're talking about Tai, Davis, Ken and Cody… there out getting provisions, because they couldn't find the key to your liquor cabinet. I didn't tell them it was hidden under your bookcase, thanks for that, I don't think I could have taken much more. I don't remember Tai's party being like this." 

I laughed walking into my kitchen. "That's because Tai was out cold after I got to him. Be happy because I have no urge to see how long you'd last against me." 

TK laughed stumbling behind me. "So do you have some magical hair-of-the dog-that-bit-me and all that stuff wonder drink?" 

I reached into my cupboard and brought out a bottle. "Drink this and don't ask what it is." 

TK took it and drank a little and pulled on a face, before drinking the rest in one go.

"So little brother, whose idea was it to crash my house for your bachelor party?" I asked pulling off my jacket. 

"Tai's and Davis' said cause you didn't have a wife or girlfriend you wouldn't have her bugging you to clean up." TK put the empty bottle in the sink and pushed his mussed up short blond hair into place. 

"How wrong they were, if we don't have this house clean by this time tomorrow, Kari is going to have a fit." I said patting TK on the back. "The hall you hired pulled out I volunteered my house for the reception." 

TK was starting to look more sober then a minute ago. "What? Oh crap." He muttered looking around at the state of my kitchen. 

I smirked. "This'll teach you to mess up my house without inviting me to the party." 

"Matt!" TK yelled. "You're not being helpful! Not that you ever are, anyway you don't even live here often." 

I laughed. "Just kidding Teekers. When the guys get here we'll clean up, can Izzy and Joe make it?" 

TK nodded "They're getting here tomorrow afternoon for the major party."

"Great," I picked up my phone book. "Know what I'm gonna call up Don. I know it's been a while since I worked for him but he knows way more than I do about cooking. Best caterer you'll ever find you can tell him what Kari and you want for the meal and he'll do it. I'll start to clean up." I dialed the phone number after receiving TK's grateful nod. 

"Hello, Silver Lining, this is Don how many I help you?" 

"Don, great to hear you again, it's Yamato Ish-" I started.

"Yamato? How have you been? You could have been one of the greatest-"

"Yeah I know I could have been one of the greatest chefs, why oh why did I decide to become a world famous rock star." I laughed. "Don I need a favor, my brother's getting married in two days and the hall's pulled out of the deal we've moved it to my house but we don't have any food, think you could help?" 

"Of course you still have that wonderfully large kitchen right? Well put him on and I'll work out what food he wants." Don exclaimed. 

I smiled and handed the phone to TK. 

I walked into the lounge room and started to gather up the empty bottles. I'd just finished throwing them out when Tai and Davis burst through the door. 

"I hope you're ready for more…Matt?" Tai shouted, almost dropping the pizza boxes he was holding. 

Davis tried to look innocent holding a bag full of bottles. "What are you doing here?" 

I folded my arms. "I hope you're ready for more Matt? Boy Tai I'd better keep you away from Pete who knows what slogans would suddenly appear?" I turned to Davis. "And could it be that I live here, or it's my house, or I came to see my brother get married, or all of them?" I asked watching with amusement as Tai and Davis went a brighter shade of red. 

Cody and Ken walked in talking about something then stopped mid sentence. 

I curled the corners of my lips into a smirk. "Now who's going to clean up my house? And anyone that doesn't will be in deep shit." 

In an instant the four guys were grabbing rubbish and bolting for the bin. 

I waited till they were all out of the room and burst out laughing.

*~*~*~*~*

I flicked through the channels trying to find something that would interest me. TK, Ken and Cody had hit the sack about an hour and Davis had just stalked off fifteen minutes ago due to losing a major bet on a football match, which left Tai chuckling gleefully. I settled for watching a basketball game. 

"Matt…" Tai said slowly. 

I frowned not looking away from the screen. "Tai…" I mimicked. 

"Sora told me about Mimi and you." He mumbled. 

I turned the TV on mute and tried to not have a complete mental fit. "Well?" 

"So it's true?" He asked, leaning back into the sofa. 

I laughed hollowly. "Is it true that I made the biggest mistake of my life and let her walk out the door? Or that I slept with her, which one Taichi?" My right hand twitched, I stared at the thin white scars running from my knuckles to my wrist. 

"The first one, Yamato." Tai said. "Are you really telling the truth about that 'cause that's not what Sora told me. She told it more like you were being an asshole." 

"I was being an asshole." I growled. I clenched my fist. "That's the problem." 

Tai exhaled slowly. "You love her don't you?" 

I nodded sadly. "Totally stuffed, don't know how I made it through the last couple of months without trying to phone her." 

"Why didn't you call her?" Tai asked. 

"Because I'm a total loser, because she deserves someone who won't freeze up at the three words 'I love you', because she's ten times the person I am." I mumbled. 

"She seemed pretty depressed, the day after she got away from LA and stayed with us." Tai said. 

"Did she get over it?" I asked remembering the feel of glass shredding my hand. 

"She's hooked up with Michael. Sometimes if you walk into a room and she doesn't know you're there she'll just stare out of a window until you talk to her." Tai answered. 

I shivered remembering her haunting touch and taste. "Michael's a good guy." 

Tai slowly put his hand on my shoulder. "I know someone better." 

My head drooped. "You always were a bad liar, Tai." 

"I'm not lying." He insisted. "Anyway at the wedding, Sora's gonna try and kill you or something, I'd avoid getting cornered by her try and stick with a crowd. Night Matt." 

Tai left towards one of my spare bedrooms. 

All of the feelings of that night suddenly rushed back overloading my senses. I stumbled into my room and grabbed my guitar. I slumped into the corner and gently ran my fingers across the strings, playing the song I'd been playing every night for the last three months. 

*~*~*~*~*

TK had reached up and fiddled with his bow tie nervously causing it to go sideways. 

I sighed, reaching over and straightening it. "Here comes the bride." I sang softly.

TK's head jerked to look down the isle. He relaxed seeing the wedding hadn't started. 

A smirk planted itself on my face. "All fat and wide." I teased. 

TK's nervousness faded away and he smiled. "Quiet, I'll tell Kari you said she's fat."

I smiled innocently and folded my arms behind my back standing up straight. 

TK turned to stare down at the church doors. 

"Slipped on a banana peel." I sang, keeping my face perfectly straight.

"And goes for a ride!" Davis and Tai chorused. 

TK turned to glare at his groomsmen. The corners of his mouth twitched up, his face was so priceless that we all broke out laughing. After a moment TK joined in. 

"Thanks Matt." TK whispered into my ear when we'd finished. "God I'm nervous." 

"I'm your best man, it's my job to keep you from fainting and if you do, I get to marry the bride." I joked. 

Suddenly the doors swung open and the wedding tune started. Little Chikara walked slowly down the isle sprinkling petals as she went, looking absolutely ecstatic that she had so much attention. 

I looked over to see TK had gone pale again. 

I nudged him. "Hey, Teekers, I thought you were marrying Kari."

My little brother grinned, shaking his head. 

Chikara stopped and stood across from us. I waggled my eyebrows at her. She giggled softly. 

Next came Sora, then Yolie, both looking absolutely beautiful. Right after Yolie came Mimi. My breath caught in my throat, whatever memories I'd been living off for the last three months were discarded as I soaked her in. Everything about her was so elegant, so graceful…so perfect. The feelings that had been haunting me went tenfold. She took her place with Chikara and the other bridesmaids. 

I turned my eyes more in respect than interest to watch as Kari glided down the isle. She looked…beautiful, but to Mimi nothing worth comparison. I watched Mimi as together Kari and TK turned to the priest. Her sparkling cinnamon eyes flicked onto mine and hardened with a you-don't-even-exist look. I switched my gaze to Sora who gave me one of her you've-got-some-explaining-to-do-preferably-while-I-rip-you-to-peices frowns. I sighed and looked at Yolie she gave me a meaningful look that meant Hi-Matt-looking-good-but-check-out-Mimi! I turned my head and just watched mentally muting as TK and Kari went through their vows. I was alive enough to know when to hand TK the ring.

Not at all too soon the newly weds were walking down the isle arm in arm. Tai took Sora's arm and followed in a flash Mimi had taken hold of Davis' arm and followed them. 

Yolie took my arm and we made our slow process out of the church. 

"Hello my name is Matt, I'm an addictoholic. First it was drugs and then to replace them it was girls then to replace them was alcohol. Now it's Mimi. Dear God, can't anyone cure me?" I muttered softly enough so the only one to hear was Yolie. 

Yolie gave me her most sympathetic looks and brought her mouth up to my ear. "Try Mimi." 

I rolled my eyes and wrapped my arm around her shoulders. "Thanks." 

*~*~*~*~*

I smiled on reflex as Davis' place was traded with Michael. The blue eyed blond gave me a quick kiss on the cheek and smiled down at me, his eyes shinning with adoration. _His hair and eyes aren't the proper shade. _I criticized. _Maybe I could convince him to wear electric blue contacts and grow his hair out into those sexy looking spikes and dye it a closer shade of gold. _I realised I'd stopped smiling and was frowning at him. I brought my smile back. _And maybe I'll convince him to play the guitar and sing like a god and treat people like dirt. _I thought viciously.

Michael led me to his car, a green commodore. I took my place in the passenger seat and stared out the window and saw a man with golden hair get onto a newish looking metallic blue and black motorbike and tear off down the road. Suddenly the car seemed too roomy; I wanted something that made people sit against each other. I sighed and looked over at Michael as he drove along behind the line of cars heading towards the reception, also known as Yamato Ishida's house. I could see Matt's bike weaving in and out between cars. 

"I think I want a motorbike." I said trying to start a conversation to keep my mind focused on something else. 

Michael grinned widely. "You have such funny ideas Mimi, have you seen the number of people who die on those things, literal deathtrap." 

__

That's right treat me like a child, what am I 26?Yep 26 what do you know. I struggled onwards. "But you'd feel so free on one of them. Don't you believe in risks?" 

Again he had that indulgent smile as if I was being foolish. "Meems, I believe in security and protection for the ones I love." 

__

Aw, how sweet he's trying to sweet talk me. He must be out of practice. That little rebellious voice in my head snarled. "I'd prefer to be on the back of a bike" _Matt's bike, with Matt on it. _That little voice mumbled. 

*~*~*~*~*

I pulled up at my house after weaving through traffic so I got there before anyone else. I shut off the engine and hit the button to close my garage. I left my brand new bike that I'd bought along with a bike for Dio and bolted through my house to the front door opening it just in time for my little brother and sister-in-law. 

They beamed at me holding hands and looking like they were on top of the world. I leaned down and kissed Kari on the cheek. "Congratulations." I said stepping out of the way. "Don and his crew are in the kitchen, they've served everything out, I saw the hired band at a traffic light. They'll be here soon. Please enjoy the Ishida residence." I gave a flourished bow with my arm in a presenting gesture. 

TK laughed and Kari's smile could light up any dark room. "Thanks again Matt. I don't know what I'd do if you weren't TK's brother." 

I smiled. "You'd probably have married me." _That's right Matt, act normal. Just because she's gonna be in my house is no reason to panic. _

Kari giggled out a. "Yeah, you wish." And was lead off by TK to go sample the food. 

I stood around the door greeting people until I saw Sora striding purposely towards me. I suddenly remembered Tai's warning and disappeared into the kitchen to see Don. 

"Yamato, good to see you again. You look well enough but you'd look better if you tried this." Don exclaimed handing me a pastry. 

I bit into it dutifully, a sugary liquid squirted into my mouth. I quickly stuffed the rest in and was ready for any other food Don wanted me to eat. 

"You're still the best cook in the world." I mumbled through another mouthful. 

Don grinned. "Now that's what I like to hear. You know I told you before, you have pure talent, you would have been second in the kitchen if you'd stayed on for another month." He started to make a tray of croissants. 

I threw my tux jacket onto a spare bench and rolled up my sleeves. "Yeah I would have stayed if Canada's music college was in Japan. But I fear that if I had I would have turned out a tub of lard like you." I grabbed a couple of half finished croissants quickly fixing them and putting them on the tray. I then surveyed the apprentice chefs. 

"Not bad." Don muttered inspecting my work. "And I'll have you know boy, this is all pure muscle and you, you're a stick." He grinned giving me some extra dough. 

One of the things I'd missed most about Don apart from the food was how we could tease each other non stop and remain friends. We fell into the process occasionally noting the flaws in the others work. That's why it was a surprise to have Tai walk into the kitchen and tell me that the announcements were about to begin and the best man had to be present and if Don could grace them with more of his terrific food. 

I washed my hands and donned my jacket and left the kitchen after exchanging a casual insult with Don. 

*~*~*~*~*

The room suddenly seemed a whole lot smaller. No it wasn't because of him. Him with his soft sexy looking golden hair and his irresistible electric blue eyes. He'd just walked out of the kitchen with an unfairly handsome devil-may-care grin. Since the last time I'd seen him he'd grown a short golden beard that went from just above his top lip and trailed down to his chin, a goatee/mustache type of thing. All of this was neatly trimmed into a thin line and was totally unfair for me to have to look at. 

I looked away to where Kari and TK sat sadly Matt took his place on his brother's other side. After a moment to make sure everyone was settled at their places, Tai stood up and said a few words of congratulations to be replaced by Sora who also said a few words. TK smiled and stood up "I'd like to thank everyone for being here for us, to share our happiness. It means a lot to us." He beamed down at Kari. "I'd especially like to thank my brother Matt, for always being there for us and letting us use his house for this reception even though we trashed it at the bachelor party. Thanks big brother." 

All through this Matt kept his eyes on TK; he smirked and muttered something to TK that caused him to laugh. Matt looked around the room and simply said, "Thanks."

"Speech!" Tai called out suddenly then was silenced by a disapproving look from Sora. 

Matt slowly stood up and looked around the room once more his eyes resting on me for a second. "What can I say about the newly weds? I could babble on about all of the stupid things TK's done but I know he's probably got more dirt on me than I do on him. Thus I refrain from teasing." He smiled at the couple. "Never have I ever met a nicer couple than Teeks and Kari, they've been together through a lot from a very young age. To see that the spark between them has turned out this way makes me personally feel pretty jealous," Matt's eyes locked on mine. "But it's also taught me how important love is. As corny as it may sound I propose a toast to TK, Kari and to love." He tipped his wineglass in my direction, his eyes still holding mine. The rest of the room repeated the toast. 

Some other people stood up and said some speeches. I found I couldn't breathe with Yamato Ishida watching me. He finally looked away and got into an animated discussion with Yolie they both seemed to be enjoying themselves. 

I turned to discover Michael holding his hand out to me. While I'd been staring at Matt the dancing had started as the hired band that were standing on a makeshift stage started up with a slow love song. I glanced over to see Yolie and Matt were already making their way to the dance floor in a very close relaxed looking embrace. He had his cheek resting on the top of her head. 

I accepted the hand and was led onto the dance floor. 

After a while I finally convinced Michael that I was too tired to dance anymore and went to sit down next to Sora who was sitting with Chikara. I looked around to see Yolie had finally stopped dancing Matt, she leaned up and kissed him on the cheek then whispered something into his ear, which made him smile. _Oh great they're a couple, perfect, lovely, like I care!_ Yolie left to go talk to Ken. Matt turned and spotted me he strode purposely towards my table. 

He stopped right in front of us. "May I ask the for the pleasure of this dance." 

*~*~*~*~*

Mimi's look of surprise was quickly replaced with a look of hatred. I turned slightly to make it look like I was asking Sora. Her eyes hardened and I remembered Tai's advice of not getting cornered by her. Once again I changed my tactics holding out my hand to the last female at the table, Chikara on Sora's lap, looking fidgety as ever. "What do you say my darling?" I drawled hoping I'd pulled it off. Chikara giggled and took my hand, leaping off her mother's lap. I took a glance at Mimi who looked thoughtful and Sora who was seething. 

Together Chikara and I walked off into the dance floor where Chikara promptly showed me her bunny dance where she sort of hopped from side to side waving her arms bobbing up and down. I laughed and joined in building up on the moves until we were both jumping around to the extent that people had to move to avoid being bumped over. 

"Oh my god! You're Matt Ishida!" The singer of the band yelled suddenly cutting off the song. The rest of his band cut off and stared at me in awe. 

I stopped jumping around suddenly aware of everyone staring at me. "Er, yeah that's me." I said sheepishly. 

"Man you're my idol, you're really great. Hey do you think you could play a song with us, please?" The hired singer begged. 

I looked around unsure. 

"Go on Matt." Yolie called. 

"Yeah go on Matt, I wanna request the song." Kari said. 

I smiled at her and nodded finally. "Yeah ok, just let me get my guitar."

*~*~*~*~*

Matt strapped on his guitar with loving care and did a few experimental strums. _Great! Now I'm jealous of his guitar!_ He looked up at the members of the band that were staring at him like he was some sort of god. _I wonder if that's what I look like when no one's watching me. _

"Ok, I'm ready." He said softly into the microphone. 

Kari thought for a second, then a smile bloomed up on her face. She told Yolie. Yolie gave him a wink and jumped up onto the stage. She whispered something into his ear. _Flirt! _

He looked at her for a second then smiled. Giving her a brief hug. 

He turned to the band and asked them something I couldn't hear. 

The band nodded repetitively. 

He stepped back up to the microphone and started to pick out the notes.

The drummer joined in a sort of slow song. 

Matt looked up fixing his blue eyes on mine he opened his mouth to sing.

"There's nothing you can say

Nothing you can do

Nothing in between

You know the truth

Nothing left to face

Nothing left to lose

Nothing takes your place"

The rest of the band joined in fleshing the song out and building it up. I shivered as his soft husky voice surrounded me. I watched his mouth in fascinated horror as the words slowly penetrated my brain.

"When they say you're

Not that strong

You're not that weak

It's not your fault

And when you climb up to your hill

Up to your place

I hope you're well"

The band apart from the drummer and Matt shut off again. _Oh god…He's not, is he?_

"There's nothing left to prove

Nothing I won't do

Nothing like the pain

I feel for you

Nothing left to hide

Nothing left to fear

I am always here"

The band jumped in again. Beside me Sora seemed to be having a fit.

"When they say you're

Not that strong

You're not that weak

It's not your fault

And when you climb up to your hill

Up to your place

I hope you're well"

I felt my heart start to beat rapidly.

Matt's fingers glided across the strings. He watched me with calm eyes. 

Everyone else in the room was watching as if hypnotised. I felt my breathing increase.

"What you want

What you lost

What you had

What is gone is over

What you've got

What you love

What you need 

What you have is real

If it's not enough

It's not enough

It's not enough 

It's not enough I'm sorry

If it's not enough

It's not enough

It's not enough

It's not enough"

He stepped back slightly no longer singing and let his hands skim over the strings. Matt stepped back up to the microphone and sung softly.

"When they say you're

Not that strong

You're not that weak

It's not your fault

And when you climb up to your hill

Up to your place

I hope you're well"

"It's not enough

No 

It's not enough

It's not enough"

__

He stopped looking perfectly calm as the song ended. 

I reached over to my glass hoping he couldn't tell how frayed my control was right now. I wanted to cry, curse, and worsted of all I wanted to kiss Matt more than ever. I could feel Sora's annoyance radiating towards Matt. I looked up to see Matt smile at me faintly. The wedding guest seemed to be stuck in some sort of awe. 

*~*~*~*~*

Before anyone could even think of applauding my fingers were manipulating my guitar strings again, this time at a faster pace, I felt empowered somehow by the looks that I'd seen cross Mimi's face during the song. 

"So better man I am since I

Come into contact with you

And you taught so many things about myself

And you know this is true.

But now we are apart and it's all my fault

Cos you know I need to be alone

Don't know myself

So how can I share me with you girl or anyone?"

Mimi choked on her wine. 

"Don't want to be a thorn in your side

Good woman

Always be the one

To make you cry

Don't wanna be that guy

Good woman

Cos you deserve everything

And I got nothing so leave me

And I'll go away better off I stay

Far from you, you, you, you,

Because you are beautiful."

I watched her soaking in every expression that crossed her perfect face, treasuring it. 

"Beautiful woman" 

"Now typical man

I am because you think

I want my cake and eat it too

Cos say I can't be in a relationship

But I still feel for you

Cos you are the best woman

This old man has ever met

You taught me about my soul

You shared with me your magic."

She looked troubled, as if she couldn't work out what to do. I felt a burst of hope.

"Don't want to be a thorn in your side

Good woman

Always be the one

To make you cry

Don't wanna be that guy

Good woman

Cos you deserve everything

And I got nothing so leave me

And I'll go away better off I stay

Far from you, you, you, you,

Because you are beautiful"

I stopped singing and brought my hand up and down the neck of my guitar at a rapid pace falling into the instrumental. Finally I stopped and played a very slow basic pattern repeating it over and over. 

"Better man I am since I

Come into contact with you

And you taught

So many things about myself

And you know this is true

But now we are apart and it's all my fault

Cos you know I need to be alone

Don't know myself

So how can I share me with you girl

Or anyone"

Mimi looked panicked, looking around, looking for an escape route.

"Beautiful, Beautiful, Beautiful woman

Beautiful, Beautiful, Beautiful woman

So better man, I am

So better man, I am

Better Man I am

Cos of you, 

Cos of you,

Beautiful, Beautiful, Beautiful woman

Beautiful, Beautiful, Beautiful woman

So better man, I am

So better man, I am

So better man, I am

So better man, I am…because of you."

I stopped and watched her intently, wondering how she'd react. She slowly, so not to bring attention to herself got up and walked out of the room.

I shrugged off my guitar and shoved it into its case leaving it leaning against the wall. I waited until the applause was over and then quickly followed Mimi's example. 

*~*~*~*~*

I entered the furthest door from the reception and cursed my luck of picking Matt's room. His room had a rustic comfy feel I looked around apart from photos of some people I didn't know and several of the DigiDestin together and separate there wasn't many personal items. I frowned finding smashed mirror lying on the floor. On his cupboard was a largish photo of the rock star himself wicked smile on his face holding a laughing Yolie in his arms at the beach. They both looked happy together… I choked flopping onto his bed crying into his sheets that smelt way too much like Matt right now. 

I heard the door quietly click shut. I looked up squinting through tears to see who it was. Matt stood there staring at me. I wiped my eyes and tried to look as menacing as I could, lying on his bed, crying almost a foot shorter than him. 

He stood there back against the door watching. 

__

I need to get out of here. I thought wishing he wasn't blocking the door. I glared at him. "What's wrong Matt, I'd think you'd be used to seeing different women on your bed." I sat up shoving my hair out of my eyes. 

Matt took a step towards me an odd look of seriousness in his usually playful eyes. "It may be a surprise to you but you're the first woman to ever sit, lay or anything else on this bed." He said softly. "And no woman on any bed anywhere in this world is as exquisite as you." 

I leapt to my feet and slapped him. 

He didn't flinch he slowly raised his hand to hold mine. His hand had fine white scars running across it. Ever so slowly watching me all the time he brought my hand to his mouth. I watched in fascinated horror as he slowly kissed every fingertip pinky to index. My breath caught in my throat. He slowly, his blue eyes still watching mine, turned my hand over and trailed kisses over my lifeline. 

"You meant every word didn't you?" I whispered hoarsely. 

Matt stopped and brought my hand to rest over his heart. Ever so slowly still watching me, ready to flee, he brought his soft lips down on mine. 

Thoughts dissolved away as soon as his warm talented lips touched mine. His free hand gently toyed with my hair. I could feel his heart pounding at a beat rapider than mine. 

The door swung open and in came Michael. "Mimi are you in here…?" He stopped. 

Matt and I leapt away from each other. Matt looked thoroughly pissed. 

Michael clenched his fists. "What the hell do you think you're doing with my girlfriend!?" He yelled. 

The two blond men glared at each other. "I **_was_** kissing her." Matt growled. 

There was an awful crunch as Michael's fist connected with Matt's nose. Matt's hand rose up to cover his nose blood seeped through his fingers. Matt's free hand smashed into Michael's eye. 

I stood petrified into place as the two men squared off. All of a sudden Tai was in between them holding them apart. 

*~*~*~*~*

I wiped the blood away from my nose and glared at Michael who was being restrained by Tai. Mimi stood just next to my bed looking like a deer in headlights, tears in eyes. 

"What in god's name is going on here?" A familiar voice shouted. 

I turned to see Sora standing in the doorway looking furious. _I don't need this! _My mind shouted. "I don't need this." I repeated out loud and pushed past her. 

I got halfway down the corridor before a small bomb tackled me against the wall. 

Sora glared up at me. "I've been you're friends for most of your life Yamato Ishida, but never have I been so disgusted in the way you treat people." She hissed. 

I shoved her off me and started to walk away. 

She grabbed my arm. "You are not walking away from me, I've been here for you most of **_my_** life and I've always told you the truth. You have been a complete bastard to Mimi toying with her affections like she was one of those sluts you seem to like. You have hurt her more than you can ever understand and then you have the guts to take another go. If you don't have a conscious let me be the replacement, you've stuffed up big time Mattie. And remember not once in my life have I lied to you."

I sagged. _Maybe she's right. _"What do you advise?" I asked soberly. 

Sora loosened her grip on my arm. "She doesn't need you, leave her alone. Let her get on with life and at get togethers don't talk to her outside a group. I'm telling you this for her sake Matt." 

I nodded slowly. _Leave her alone, don't hurt her again. _"I'm going to stay at a motel until I'm going back to America." I mumbled. "I won't tell you which one." I walked away from her slipping away from the party and into my garage, grabbing my bags out of the car from where I'd left them and jumped on my bike heading towards the closest doctor's office to get my nose checked. 

__

Who knows? I thought savagely. _I might find myself a mirror to smash._

*~*~*~*~*

I sobbed onto Tai's shoulder as he sat next to me on Matt's bed. He wrapped his arm around me. Sora had disappeared after Matt after he'd pulled his I don't need this act. Michael had gone back to the party and was having Joe take a look at his eye, which had already taken on a purplish colour. 

"What am I gonna do Tai?" I sobbed. 

"Marry Matt?" He suggested. 

I drew back, _Matt the Rebel? Matt the Untouchable Rock star? Matt the Unpredictable? Married? _I thought incredulously. But there was a small part of my brain that showed us living together and waking up to his smile everyday. 

I looked around his room for something to change the subject. Now I looked at it the picture of Matt and Yolie looked more along the lines of friends. 

"What does Matt spend his money on? He's got a motorbike and I'm pretty sure I saw a Porsche but this house isn't worth all that much for a man that makes thousands a year." _Oh yeah, way to change the subject Mimi! _

Tai smiled all of a sudden and pulled me to my feet. He led me over to another door in Matt's room. "What do you think this is?" Tai asked. 

I frowned looking around the room; the bathroom was through the other door on the other side of the room. "The closet?" I guessed. 

Tai grinned playfully. "If Matt found out I was showing anyone this he'd be very cross." He felt around the back of the chest of drawers then his hand reemerged holding a key. He unlocked the mystery door to reveal a staircase. Tai grabbed my hand and led me down.

When we finally got down to the basement Tai fumbled around for the light switch as I tried to see what was down there. 

The lights flicked on to show a large room with a small desk and chair, a CD player and more than a couple of hundred different types of guitars. I stared in shock. 

Tai laughed. "Amazing isn't it? I knew the guy was hooked on music but I didn't know it was this bad until I found him down here writing down lyrics. He loves this room I'd be surprised if any guitar in this room is out of tune, I think I heard him tuning some last night. He collects them probably worth a lot to weirdo's out there" He sat down at Matt's desk, and grinned. "Many a song was created on this table it's probably worth quite a lot to the Timber Wolves fans." I walked up and down the isles of guitars in awe. 

"Matt's a good guy." Tai said suddenly. "If he didn't tell you today, I'll let you know that he didn't mean to hurt you." 

I looked at the floor. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do." 

*~*~*~*~*

I sat in Michael's car, staring out the window at the gray clouded sky. Matt had disappeared from his house and hadn't been seen since he drove off. Officially I had to be back at work in three days but Michael had convinced …nagged me to stay at his house for a little while. I sighed, leaning back into the seat. Michael's eye was bruised and swollen. I closed my eyes when he smiled at me wishing him away. I opened my eyes to find him still sitting there, driving his ugly olive green car. He reached out and turned the radio on. 

"Hey you're listening to the hottest station, Triple 6. We're doing request songs. Hi what are you requesting?" The radio announcer asked. 

"Hey can I request Low by Timber Wolves?" The caller asked. 

"You certainly can, there's something about that song isn't there just makes me want to dance around the studio." The announcer confided. 

"Yeah it's a totally cool song I think Matt Ishida is so sexy! He's such a-" 

Michael's hand snapped out and silenced the girl's voice mid sentence. _I'm with you sister. _I thought vaguely, ignoring the look over anger that had appeared on the driver's face. 

I pressed my forehead against the window. _I can't do this. _

"I was thinking about what you said, about wanting a motorbike." Michael said slowly. "I was thinking I could buy you one when we get back to America." 

I shrugged. _Does it come with it's own Yamato Ishida?_

Michael pulled up at the airport. I grabbed my bags and got out of the car. He walked over and wrapped his arms around me. "I can understand how you must feel, having Ishida make a move on you, but I'm not like him." He whispered into my ear, he started to trail kisses down my neck.

I jammed my elbow into his chest and leapt away. "No you're not." I mumbled.

He looked confused. "Ok I understand, you don't want to move into this so fast." 

"I can't do this, I don't even want to move in that direction." I exclaimed. 

He took a step closer. "Do what Meems?" 

"This." I shouted, waving my hand between us. "God you're a nice guy, but you're so damn predictable! I don't want this." 

He looked hurt. " I can change." He said slowly. 

I laughed wiping my eyes trying not to cry. "Don't change, you're considerate and loyal but we just don't have anything." 

He straightened up. "It's Ishida isn't it?" 

I nodded looking away. "I have to go." I said grabbing my things again and running towards the closest taxi. 

One more chapter to go I'll try and bring it up soon just fixing some minor glitches, at the latest it'll be up 5th of December (Australian Time)


	5. Messages

Disclaimer: They still aren't mine but I'm considering begging on my hands and knees to borrow Matt. I don't own Take me Away by Lifehouse or Chemicals Between us by Bush. 

Oh I also don't own a translating device, so if anyone's bored enough to translated the babble that my 'dear' 'friend' Savoan Locc was going on about cause I didn't understand a word of it. (Maybe I'm just dumb….) I salute you Mr Locc for being able to write 285 words and have it all make no sense at all. And if this means I'm on your hit list right on. I could use a good laugh. 

Chapter 5 **Messages**

"Are you sure you haven't seen or heard from him?" I asked for probably the twentieth time. 

"I'm sure Mimi, I haven't seen or heard from him since the wedding. Sorry I can't help." Izzy said. 

I rolled over on my bed. "No it's ok, I'll call Ken." 

"Have you tried his mobile?" He asked.

I froze. _God I'm such an idiot. _"No, god why didn't I think of that? Um do you have the number?"

"No, sorry I don't know it, have you rang Yolie. She's pretty close to Matt, I'd ring her." He yawned. 

"Yeah thanks Izzy. Talk to you later." I sighed. Immediately I dialed Yolie's number. 

"Hello?" She mumbled sleepily. 

"Hey, Yolie, it's Mimi here have you seen or heard from Matt lately?" I asked crossing my fingers. 

"Mimi?" She said slowly waking up. "No sorry I haven't heard from him since the wedding." 

I took a deep breath. "But you run the record company he uses, don't you know how to contact him?" I asked desperately. 

"Sorry Mimi, the wolves are on vacation and none of them can be contacted all of them are off on holidays. I caught Dio on his mobile once but he said Matt's probably on a tropical island relaxing. I tried to ring Matt's mobile but it's been canceled. Sora did a nice job didn't she?" 

"Yeah." I mumbled. "I've rang everyone, even TK and Kari they haven't had a call from anyone." 

"Well I really can't help until the band starts touring again, and that's not for another month. He's could be anywhere he's got the money." 

"Yeah well, if he does contact you get his number please. Bye" I muttered.

I stared at the only pictures I had of Matt, on one of the Timber Wolves CDs that I'd bought just to hear his voice. I grabbed the phone again quickly dialing. 

"Hello, how may I help you?" A bored voice asked. 

"Hi, I'd like the number for Matt Ishida." I asked. 

The voice gave a snort of a laugh. "You and every other hormone driven female in the world." 

I frowned. "No I'm serious, he's a friend of mine. My name is Mimi Tachikawa." 

The operator laughed again. "The actress? Yeah right and I'm the President of the United States." 

"Look!" I yelled. "Are you going to get me the number or do I have to ring you up over and over again?" 

"Yeah, yeah." He muttered. "Hang on I'll search." 

I waited.

"Sorry that number has a special restriction on it. Under no circumstances will it ever be given out." 

I sighed and hung up. _Thanks a lot Sora. _

*~*~*~*~*

I watched as the snow piled up on the windowsill, sipping boiling hot coffee. I was at Dio's house in Canada, where I'd lived after the first year of boarding at the Music College. First year I met Dio, Mike and Steve all in the same class competing against each other for the teachers favor. After becoming fast friends Dio insisted I moved in with him and his house became the home for the Timber Wolves jam sessions. It was commonly referred to as the 'Den'. 

Dio himself walked into the room. "Hey Matt, I've got a date tonight so I won't be around for long." 

I nodded watching as a particularly slow snowflake drifted down.

Dio turned and frowned at me I could see his reflection in the window. "Matt get a hold of yourself, you've been totally wiped since LA you seemed to be getting better when you went to the wedding but now you're all quiet and it's freaking me out dude! I lied to Yolie for you, you didn't even tell me why I was lying just to lie if anyone was looking for you and you're moping around my house." He said desperately trying to get me to respond he changed tactics. "Your hair is all messy." 

I turned to him and smiled. "I'm thinking of going on a road trip," I confided, "Remember how we used to do that a lot? God I miss doing that." 

He grinned. "Yeah? Can I come? We'll get on our bikes and ride from town to town until we have to get back to work." 

I raked my fingers through my hair, hoping that I didn't look as surprised as I felt. "You actually serious or you just joking around?" 

"Serious dude, sound's like fun. I'm not doing much around here going out on a couple of dates but none of them have actually clicked yet." He nudged me grinning. "But do you think Yolie and I have a chance?" 

I laughed, clapping him on the shoulder. "As much as anyone else does, my man." 

He cracked his knuckles. "So when is the road trip?"

"I was planning on taking off tomorrow, I've got plans in LA I was gonna drive all the way there, it'll take a while but you still up for it?" I asked stretching my legs out.

"Yeah! So we're just taking some money, credit cards and some changes of clothes?" He asked. 

"Yup." 

*~*~*~*~*

I pulled the motorbike to a halt in front of Yolie's house and bolted up the stairs slipping a letter into her mailbox. I quickly got back on my bike and tore off down the road; I glanced back and saw a violet haired figure waving after me frantically. I ignored her and sped on faster hooking up with Dio at a traffic light. 

"So," He said revving his pitch-black bike. "Now your business is done, last one to the outskirts of town pays for dinner." 

I grinned letting my bike roar. "You're on, I'd like a pizza, just so you know." 

"Yeah? Well I could go for ice-cream." Dio yelled than with a squeal of rubber tore off down the road. 

*~*~*~*~*

Brrrring! I rolled over and snatched up the phone. "Hello?"

"Mimi, it's Yolie! Matt was here! He didn't talk to me he dropped of a letter and drove off before I could even say anything. Inside the letter was another letter and a note that told me to send it to you. I could, read it to you… or I could send it to you in the mail." Yolie's voice wavered at the end. 

I felt a stab of jealousy that Yolie had seen him. "Read it…please." I muttered. 

Yolie was quiet for a minute than slowly in a half-choked voice read two short words. "I'm sorry."

I closed my eyes and let the phone drop out of my hand, curling up into a ball. 

__

Oh god why me?

*~*~*~*~*

"Come on Mimi, drink your coffee you're going to fall asleep." Sharon chided. 

I pushed the cup away and yawned. "No I don't really feel like it, I'll be fine just stayed up late looking over some work." 

Sharon smiled twirling a strand of hair around her finger. "So you ready for some hardcore shopping? You've been working non stop since we got back, if I don't find you some more work you'll have to go back to acting."

I laughed. "I'm not acting again for a little while, wouldn't want to leave you alone, you'd stuff something up." 

Sharon stood up and threw her cup in the bin. "Thanks for the vote of confidence." 

I smiled following her to the nearest clothes shop. She picked up a silvery top and held it against her. "What do you think girl?" 

I stared critically. "Well… it looks good but this bit here is gonna fray after a couple of washes. See?" I rubbed my thumb over the material. 

"Yeah." She hung the top up again. "Know what sucks about being fashion designers? We know to much about quality, otherwise we'd be buying everything." 

I shrugged, searching the racks for something wearable. 

"Oh god that's right, I was meant to pick up some cold medicine for Robert. Come on let's get it now." Sharon led me to the chemist and walked in immediately having trouble deciding what brand to get. I smiled and looked over at the shop next door. 

A large TV was playing in the front window obviously on mute. I watched the ads then the main program came back on it was some sort of top ten music clips of the week. 

The number one clip started. The camera showed a hotel building along with the tacky flashing sign it quickly zoomed around corners until it stopped at a single door that was suddenly pulled open a crying brunet ran out of the room slamming the door behind her. 

The door seemed to blur and suddenly it cleared showing the inside of the room. A blond man stood in the middle of the room looking shocked then shimmered and disappeared. Matt with his head in his hands was sitting on the edge of a hotel bed wearing a tight black shirt and baggy blue jeans looking incredibly delicious. He looked up at the camera with his bright blue eyes and started to sing looking lost. I moved closer hoping to hear what he was singing. 

After finishing the last word he fell back onto the bed and the scene changed to a crowded club. The Timber Wolves band were on the stage jamming away, Matt standing at the front fingers working magic on his guitar strings, singing into his microphone. In the middle of the dance floor two people stood out the blond and the brunet dancing together looking perfectly happy. Then suddenly shimmered and disappeared. Matt looked away as if the sight hurt him. 

The camera zoomed out and Matt was sitting at a park bench alone, watching the blond and the brunet lying on the grass laughing. He was singing with a look of regret on his face. The couple on the grass ran off as it started to rain. Matt still sat there on the bench as rain trickled down his face the scene faded as he looked away again. 

The Timber Wolves were suddenly playing in a church with a wedding happening in the background. Matt grabbed the microphone and sung softly. There were a couple of shots of the rest of the band. And as the wedding in the background ended it showed the brunet walking away from the blond. 

The church itself shimmered and was replaced by a party with the band up away from the crowd on a circular stage. The brunet was dancing with a different blond and the previous blond was dancing with someone else while watching the brunet. 

Suddenly the whole thing disappeared till it was all back in the hotel room. The blond was standing in the middle of the room looking shocked. As a shimmered Matt watched from the bed, singing. Slowly Matt stood up and walked over to the blond and stepped into him. There was a sort of glow for a second then the blond stepped away shimmering and walked out the door leaving Matt in his place. 

"Well that was weird." Sharon mumbled into my ear making me jump out of my skin. "I don't understand what that song was about but the lead singer sure is hot."

I nodded slowly. "Too hot." 

*~*~*~*~*

I jumped into my car hoping I wasn't as late as my watch was telling me. I put a breakfast bar in my mouth and started the engine hoping that I wouldn't get caught in traffic. The radio flicked on.

__

"This time all I want is you.

There is no one else

Who can take your place

This time you burned me with your eyes

You see past all the lies 

You take it all away."

I ripped open the packet and chewed on the bar. 

__

"I've seen it all and it's never enough

It keeps leaving me needing you.

Take me away 

Take me away

I've got nothing left to say 

Just take me away."

I frowned as a car overtook me almost hitting my car. 

__

"I try to make my way to you 

But still I feel so lost 

I don't know what else I can do."

Something tickled at the back of my head as if I should be noticing something. 

__

"I've seen it all and it's never enough

It keeps leaving me needing you

Take me away

Take me away 

I've got nothing left to say

Just take me away."

Something important…

__

"Don't give up on me yet 

Don't forget who I am

I know I'm not there yet 

But don't let me stay here alone."

Something…

__

"This time all I want is you 

There is no one else 

Who can take your place

This time you burned me with your eyes 

You see past all the lies 

You take it all away."

That would change things.

__

"I've seen it all and it's never enough

It keeps leaving me needing you."

I threw the empty wrapper into the back seat trying to remember what was wrong.

__

"Take me away

Take me away

I've got nothing left to say

Just take me away."

I listened to the song halfheartedly, trying to think.

__

"Take me away

Take me away 

I've got nothing left to say

Just take me away."

The song! It's…

"Hey everybody this is Triple 6 and we were just hearing the latest tune out from Timber Wolves and here in this very room is the alpha male of the pack, the guy that makes women all over the world swoon, the man, the one the only Matt Ishida!" 

An animated wolf howl burst out over my speakers. 

I swerved suddenly, almost running into a truck causing a sudden burst of car horns. I pulled over and turned the radio up. 

*~*~*~*~*

I sat in a comfy chair listening to an animated wolf howl. Tony the DJ of the station grinned at me. The howl finally stopped. "So Matt, how do you feel?" He asked into the microphone. 

I smiled sheepishly, "Really embarrassed."

Tony laughed. "Sorry about that. So Matt you're the lead singer and guitarist of the world famous band Timber Wolves. Tell me why did you called yourselves that?" 

"Well when I was fifteen I was in a band called the Teenage Wolves. When I went to College in Canada I met up with Dio and the guys when we finally decided we were going to be a band, I was so obsessed with the name Teenage Wolves. The guys told me that we couldn't be teenage wolves when we're twenty so we changed it to Timber Wolves." 

"Also who started up the Timber Wolves Howl? It suddenly kicked in after your first couple of songs." 

I laughed. "That was Mike, we were on our first tour and totally nervous and he was way to full of energy we'd all been drinking softdrinks for the entire flight and he has some sort of sugar disorder. At the very end of the concert after our last song, he jumped up and started howling and encouraging the crowd to join in, pretty soon it became our own sort of personal cheer. The moral of this story is not to have a guy who can't handle sugar in your band." 

"Heh, cool. So would you refer to yourself as the alpha wolf of the band?" He asked. 

I shrugged. "Yeah I guess just don't tell the guys I said that."

"So if you're the alpha wolf, is there a beta wolf back home?" 

I shook my head. "No, I can't really have a decent relationship while travelling all the time, one day I hope to go get the right girl but, I really don't think I'm responsible enough right now."

"I've heard several rumors about you having a mental breakdown four months ago. Is that true?" 

__

What am I going to say…? "Nah, it wasn't a break down I was seriously drunk and I tripped or something suddenly my fist went through the mirror and I'm apparently having a break down." I joked.

"Kay, so about your new song Take me away, we just listened to it and I personally loved it, so tell me what's it about?" 

I took a deep breath. "Regret, that's what it's about. Regretting the way things turned out in life and trying to reason with life." 

"So would you say this song deals with your life or someone you know?" 

"Yeah." I mumbled. 

"Didn't catch you there Matt?" Tony said. 

"Yeah, it's a song that deals with someone very close to me." I said finally. 

"Ok, well as much as I'd love to chat some more I have to give the listeners a chance so here we go!" Tony clicked some buttons. 

"Hello?" A female's voice said excitedly. 

"Hey there!" I called.

"Oh my god! First of all you guys are the greatest and I love your music." She gushed. 

"Thanks." I replied. 

"Secondly, I heard that Matt isn't you're real name and you're not Canadian, is that true?" 

I laughed. "Oh man, yeah it's true, I was born in Japan and Matt's just my nickname. When I moved here I just slid into being called Matt because it was less noticeable. My real name is Yamato, I'd prefer to be called Matt though." 

"Ok thanks Matt." 

"Ok, next caller is." Tony said hitting another button. 

"Hey Matt." A very familiar voice said. "You haven't talked to your god-daughter in weeks. She's not very happy with you." 

"Tai what do you want?" I sighed. 

"I wanna ask a question I get one question that's what the radio dude said." I could tell he was grinning over the phone. 

"And?" I asked. 

*~*~*~*~*

"Tell me straight out who this song is about, full name please." Tai said smugly. 

__

Tai? What the hell is he doing? I thought turning up the radio to listen to the answer ignoring the traffic whizzing by. 

"It's about me Tai." Matt muttered obviously annoyed. 

"Nup! Who else Mattie?" Tai called. 

__

Yeah come on Matt tell me. 

"I don't have to answer that." Matt snapped. 

"Unca Matt?" Chikara's sweet voice called over the radio. 

"Wha-? Hey Kara." Matt said. 

"Unca Matt, you know how you told me you'd never lied to me? Who else is the song about?" She asked innocently. 

"Tai you're using your own daughter did you know that?" Matt muttered. 

"Answer her question Matt I'm doing this for the best." Tai soothed. 

"Alright! Alright! Fine! It's about Mimi ok it's about her! I miss her for god sake. Now go to hell and take your wife with you!" Matt yelled. There was an odd thump and then static. 

"Um, well Matt Ishida has left the building, ah, so check out a classic Timber Wolves song." The radio announcer stuttered. 

I could feel my heart soar. I pulled my car out of park and sped back home. 

*~*~*~*~*

Another concert, the first concert of the tour for the year. I strummed idly at the strings of my guitar watching as Mike tuned his bass guitar. Dio grinned at me; guitar tuned already and started adding a melody to my tune. Instantly Steve jumped in tapping his drumsticks on a chair. I smiled stopping as Pete walked through the door. 

"Ok boys, I can see you've already warmed up sounding good as always." He complemented. 

Mike did a little riff on his bass and nodded. "I'm ready." 

Pete nodded. "Ok paws in." He stuck his fist out we all got up and added ours. "Timber Wolves!" He howled pumping his fist in the air. We followed suit adding our own Wolf Howl. I grabbed my guitar and led the others down the corridor then walked onto the stage. I plugged in my guitar and made sure everyone was ready before nodding my head at Pete. In less than a second the curtains disappeared revealing the howling crowd. 

Dio and Mike dove into the song as Steve and I held back. 

I stepped forward and grabbed the microphone with one hand and sung. 

"I want you to remember

A love so full it could send us all ways

I want you to surrender

All my feelings rose today"

Steve dove in adding his beat. 

"And I want you to remain

The power of children can amaze

I'll try not to complain"

The music stopped.

"I know that's a pisser baby"

We all dove in.

"The chemicals between us

The walls that lie between us

Lying in this bed

The chemicals displaced

There is no lonelier state

Than lying in this bed"

__

God what was I thinking when I wrote this song? It's like it's for her. 

Mike did a little riff as I waited for my cue.

"I want you to remember

Everything you said

Every driven word

Like a hammer

Hell

To my head"

__

Hell what am I thinking everything reminds me of her. 

"The chemicals between us

The walls that lie between us

Lying in this bed

The chemicals displaced

There is no lonelier fate

Than lying in this bed"

__

I can smell her, I can taste her, I can feel her I've even started to hear her.

"Chemicals between us

Chemicals between us

Lying in this bed"

__

Next I'll start seeing her. Dio did his own little guitar solo. 

"We're of the hollow men

We are the naked ones

We never meant you harm

Never meant you wrong"

I could see someone standing on side stage just out of view from everyone but me.

"And I'd like to thank"

I took a quick glance. 

"All my lovers"

My hand slipped causing the chord to go horribly wrong and I stopped singing staring at the Mimi I was seeing.

"Lovers

Lovers

Lovers

Lovers

Lovers"

The word echoed throughout the stage.

The rest of my band jammed on ready for me to jump back into the song then after a moment they stopped and even the crowd who'd been singing along happily stopped and an odd silence filled the air. 

"Matt? Matt? What's wrong man?" Steve called through my earpiece. I reached up and yanked it out taking the mini microphone with it. 

Mimi looked both embarrassed and ecstatic. I started walking towards her. 

*~*~*~*~*

Matt started walking towards me completely ignoring the worried calls of his band. 

My heart did a little back flip. 

He stopped suddenly and looked annoyed. 

The cord that connected his guitar to the amplifier was holding him back. His guitar safely strapped to his shoulder. With one fluid movement he unclipped the strap and his precious guitar fell to the stage floor with an awful discord screech. 

In a flash he was by my side. He gently placed a hand on my cheek and looked thrilled when his skin touched mine. I smiled up at him. "Hey sexy." 

He grinned, that gorgeous smile and leaned down and kissed me. "God I missed you." He mumbled pulling me into a hug. I sighed breathing him in. 

He pulled back slightly, his electric blue eyes glittering mischievously. "Let's go."

I smiled and let him lead me away. 

*~*~*~*~*

"And lastly, in Canada, the world famous band Timber Wolves ended their first concert of the year in a very peculiar way." 

"Sora some in here." Tai called watching the television. 

"What is it?" Sora asked sitting next to him. 

He just pointed at the screen looking shocked. Sora took a look. 

"Matt Ishida, the lead singer of the band stopped singing in the first song of the night and just walked off stage." The reporter explained. 

Tai and Sora stared in shock as Matt stopped singing, started walking away then stopped because his guitar was holding him back and dropped the guitar to the floor and walked off. 

"Mr. Ishida disappeared and hasn't been seen for two weeks. His band mates and manager say they have no idea where he's gone." 

Tai flipped the TV onto mute and turned to stare at his wife. "Something's wrong." 

"He'd never just walk off…" Sora mumbled looking confused. 

"He'd never drop his guitar…" Tai added even more confused. 

Chikara ran into the room holding a parcel. "Mommy, Daddy look what we got!" 

"Not now Kara, we're thinking." Tai said vaguely. 

"But I wanna see what's inside!" Chikara whined. 

Sora absentmindedly took the parcel and opened it for her daughter to avoid any tantrums. 

"Thank you mummy." Chikara chirped before looking at the contents of the parcel. 

"Do you think we should call Yolie? She might know." Tai asked. 

"It's worth a shot." Sora replied picking up the phone and dialing Yolie's number.

"Daddy, Daddy! This is for you." Chikara insisted dropping a piece of paper into her father's open hand.

He smiled down at her. "Thank you." 

Chikara smiled hugging a brand new expensive looking doll.

Tai frowned. _Who would spend that much money on Kara? _

"Hi Yolie? It's Sora we were wondering if you'd heard anything on Matt." Sora asked into the phone. 

Tai raised his hand up to rub his head then remembered the paper. He looked down. It was a ticket to Hawaii for Taichi Kamiya. _What the hell? _"Chikara can I have a look at the stuff that came in the parcel?" 

Chikara diligently placed everything in her father's lap. 

Tai found two more tickets one for Sora and the other for Chikara all in first class. 

He looked up at his daughter confused. Along with her doll she was clutching a video. 

"Can I watch the video daddy?" She asked innocently. 

"Yeah go ahead." He muttered leaning forward to watch. 

After a second Matt's grinning face appeared on the screen looking extremely tan, his long hair dyed reddish gold. 

Sora dropped the phone.

"Salutations Tai and Family." He said flicking his hair back. "It is I the great Yamato Lord of All! I demand you all bow for fear of my might." He smiled. "Except for Kara of course!"

Chikara giggled from beside Tai.

"Matt!" A voice laughed. 

Matt sighed obviously trying not to laugh. "Alas Yamato Lord of All is but a love slave to Mimi Lady of All plus one!" He grinned. 

"Matt!" Mimi's voice choked out through her laughter. The screen did a quick spin and was suddenly focused on Mimi who also looked very tan and happy. "Sorry about that, Matt's been in a goofy mood for the last two weeks-." 

"You know you love it, baby." Matt's voice called. 

Mimi grinned. "See what I mean? Well we just wanted to send you this so you guys didn't worry about Matt's disappearance, tell everyone not to worry about us!"

Matt sat down next to Mimi and mumbled. "Cause I haven't even thought about you guys for weeks." 

Mimi shook her head leaning against his chest. "We're in Hawaii, it's so beautiful here, so beautiful we decided to send you all first class tickets." 

"Don't worry, by the time you guys get here we'll be at some other holiday spot. Wouldn't want to offend you guys by our antics." Matt injected.

"I don't know when we'll next see everyone, this goofball here seems really content showering me with romantic trips." Mimi said ignoring Matt. 

"I've been showering her with other things but she won't mention them." Matt said matter-of-factly. 

"Matt!" Mimi blushed. "You don't have to tell them that!"

"I'm just telling it like it is." He explained smiling down at her. 

"Yeah well I'm the child of sincerity so shut up!" She laughed. "You've just ruined the only tape we can send them!" 

Matt grinned at us. "Nah. They're all probably staring at the screen slack-jawed." He wrapped his arms around her.

Mimi rolled her eyes looking totally relaxed in his arms. "I'm gonna have to do something about you." 

"Ooh! Will it involve whipped cream?" He laughed. 

"Bye you guys." Mimi laughed. 

"Yeah, we've got some business to attend to." Matt paused taking a quick glance at the woman in his arms. He leaned forward slightly. "Hey Tai, when you get here, you have to check out the Limbo girls. Two words…Bikinis and flexible!" 

Mimi gave Matt an oh-really look and pulled him into a kiss.

With that the screen went blank. 

Tai started to laugh, looking at the shocked look on Sora's face. 

She turned her head slowly and picked up the dangling phone. "Yolie? Sorry, um we found him er, don't worry ok?" She hung up and dropped into the chair next to her laughing husband. 

Tai continued to laugh. 

"Ok yes that was funny but I haven't gotten past the shock yet ok?" Sora mumbled. 

"No." Tai choked. "I can so get him back for my 21st party! I'll play it at every gathering until it's branded into everyone's memory." 

Sora rolled her eyes. "You're such an idiot!"

**__**

THE END

Um, I just want to take the time to say thank you to everyone that reviewed me it meant a lot to me. I hope you all enjoyed reading reaching for you, I'm not sure if I'm happy with the ending or not so I may change it. I've got another story that's just started to bubble in my head so I'll be back after my vacation!


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